Transcript
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Hello, today I have with me Alex Wachelka, ibclc.
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Alex is the mother of two and became a lactation consultant after her first was born.
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If you want to work with Alex, go to motherhoodbloomslactationcom.
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Today she is going to share her birth stories with us.
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Alex, welcome and thank you so much for joining me.
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Thank you so much for having me, Kelly.
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I'm really happy to be here today, yeah.
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I'm excited to hear how you became a lactation consultant and what transpired that made you have that career choice.
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Yes, it was definitely something I never expected would happen, and it all started with the birth of my first child, and he was born in 2019.
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So I was first time mom.
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I prepared for labor and birth, reading books.
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I wanted to have an unmedicated vaginal delivery.
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I surrounded myself with stories of other people who were able to do that.
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I learned about interventions and made my plan for how I wanted to bring him into the world and where I lived at the time.
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I was under the care of midwives and I had the opportunity to birth at their clinic, so sort of like a birth center.
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They had a birthing suite in their clinic.
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I knew that for me, I wasn't going to feel safe inside a hospital and the only other option was home delivery.
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And, as a first time mom, home birth wasn't quite where I wanted to be, so I opted for their birthing suite.
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So while he arrived early so it was a little unexpected how the events played out and how he was born but my water broke actually at 39 and five.
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I had woke up in the morning.
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I just had to go to the bathroom when I sat down to pee when I think back, I swear I heard a little sound, a little pop, something inside and I was like that seems weird.
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I just got up and I went about my day but then there was like this dripping and leaking.
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I was like oh my gosh, does this mean my water broke?
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I think my water broke and I kind of let it go and I went outside to my husband.
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I was like I think my water broke very much as a first time mom you have, depending on how you prepare, we still have the aspect of media and you have that vision of what you're shown is like that gosh, like oh my gosh.
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And then labor starts and I just had this trickle and was like I don't know.
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So we called the midwives, we went in.
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They said yeah, come on in.
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No, they asked me a few questions.
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We go to see them.
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They confirmed my water did break.
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I have no contractions.
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So I was like, well, okay, what do we do?
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And we just we waited out.
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So it was this, this process of waiting to see, try some things to bring on labor, some like I was walking on the treadmill, bouncing on the ball.
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I even got to a point at one point where I was using my breast pump to try and do nipple stimulation, get the oxytocin flowing, get contractions going, and nothing was really progressing.
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I wasn't really worried.
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My midwives were a really wonderful team.
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There was no induction pressure, there was no like well, we are going to have to go to the hospital.
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It was very much assessed, my situation, and it was still evidence based.
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But I got to be fully informed in my decision making and I was like we're waiting, I'm having this baby in the birth center.
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So that was at like six am my water broke and I did not have a contraction until 1045 at night.
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And it was actually only after I had chatted with my midwives and we made the informed decision to use castor oil to get things going because nothing was happening and I was like what is going on?
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This baby was just, he was so comfortable and I was ready to start labor because it had been so long since my water had broken, and so we went through the risks and benefits, made my informed decision, drank the castor oil.
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It was disgusting.
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And then it was still like two hours, though after that nothing really happened.
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I was like, okay, he's not coming today, no problem, I'll just go to bed.
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And I was in bed for about 15 minutes and I had a very strong contraction.
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I was like, oh okay, I can't lay down through this.
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I had to get up.
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And then the next one came and I had to, like I had to walk around, I couldn't lay down through these contractions and I let them happen for about 30 minutes and then I went to get my husband and I said I'm in labor, called the midwives.
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I couldn't even.
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I couldn't even make a phone call to them.
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I think contractions were five or seven, seven minutes apart, like they were getting closer, but like, well, it's not time to come yet.
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I was like, oh my gosh, no, we need.
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I wanted to labor there instead of in my home.
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And then when they finally said that we could come in, it was probably about two hours.
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I labor at home.
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Trying to get out of our house into the truck to drive to the midwives was like we had to take breaks because it was in between contractions.
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I was inactive labor.
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I was someone who was also vomiting in labor and we know that that pressure is good.
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It was dilating was a very interesting experience.
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Like I was in the backseat of our truck and I just had a bowl and was like, oh my gosh.
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And I remember I literally don't remember the drives to the midwives.
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I barely even remember getting into the midwives.
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I remember, though, as soon as we got in, I dropped to my knees because I did a lot of my laboring on all fours.
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I dropped to my knees at the bench on their front step.
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I just put my head down and I remember my midwives off to my side and all I hear is well, this looks like active labor.
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And I was like I told you it was active labor.
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And then their birthing suite was up a very steep set of stairs.
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When you walk in its reception, the clinic is upstairs.
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So it was like, okay, the contraction ended, go.
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And I made it to the top of the stairs and I was like, okay, down again.
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The contractions would pull me down, and I would, because I was going to labor on Medicaid, and so I was like I would just drop to my hands and knees close to another contraction.
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But then, once we got there, I had their shower.
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So I use a lot of hydrotherapy.
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That was really wonderful.
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We filled up the tub, so I used hydrotherapy was so effective.
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It was something I did also when, when I had my second child and I just would spend so much time in the shower.
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I would walk around, I'd go back to the tub.
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That's what I really loved about having the birth at the birth suite, because I had that sort of freedom to move around as I needed to change positions as I needed to, and I was progressing.
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Everything was going well.
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There were no issues, no complications.
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I spent transition in the shower, which I'm glad I did.
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I was throwing up again and then finally came the time to push and when I think back I don't understand why I did what I did.
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But I guess I never fully understood how it was supposed to feel and so I was not like I wasn't pushing, like I was having a bowel movement.
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I thought I was bearing down but I was like recruiting other muscles and I was like so sore and it just wasn't.
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When I think back, especially when I compare it to birth number two, it just feels like it was very unnatural.
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But I was.
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I didn't really know when.
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I thought I had prepared and because of that it took a long time.
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I spent three hours pushing, so my active labor was only from the time those contractions started to pushing was eight hours and so first time mom, that's not bad, but then pushing was three hours because I wasn't doing it right.
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I just it is what it is.
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There was a lot of coaching also of like, okay, and now push.
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And I always felt like there was a bit of a delay, like I could feel it in my body.
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I was like no, no, no, you're saying now, but I need like three more seconds before it's truly the moment to push, and so I think that kind of threw things off a little bit.
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Ultimately, I had to get out of the tub.
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I had no intentions of having him be born in water.
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It was just like, if it happens, it happens.
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I love the water for managing the pain and they the middle.
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I said it's probably going to be best.
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You can get out of the water onto the bed.
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And I think he was almost crowning at that point and I was like I don't think I can.
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So they helped me get out.
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Remember, I sat on the bed and I was almost crowning.
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So there was pressure, my premium was stretching and I was like I thought I don't know why.
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I thought that I had sat on him.
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I was like, oh my gosh, I thought his head was out and he was not born.
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But I think it was like the pressure and I was like so.
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Then I was like panicking and I just labored for like nine hours and I was like this is on remis.
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They're like no.
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And then literally it was like one push his head was born, one push his body came out and I was like okay, we should have gone out of the tub a long time ago.
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So ultimately we did have to use that natural augmentation of the castor oil, but I was still able to have the unmedicated vaginal delivery that I had hoped for, and because of that there was no interruptions between our skin to skin time and that initial latch and we got to just hang out the three of us this is brand new family.
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Like the midwives did their check and then they just go and chart, they spent time in the other room, so we're just laying on this queen size bed in this room that kind of looks like it's your own home.
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So it was just a really comfortable experience.
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It was nice to be just like laying in a bed like that after laboring so long at night, because I mean from water breaking.
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It was a very long time, it was like 28 hours from water breaking to birth, but the labor itself was nine hours.
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So I was tired still and it was nice to be able to spend that golden hour together and have him be skin to skin on my body, and one of the things, though, that I did was I didn't get to have the breast crawl, where we have that natural.
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You know, babies have their instincts and reflexes, and they just sort of creep and crawl up to the breast to have their first latch.
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And it was only because I just, I think I felt like he had to like latch right away, when I know now that that doesn't have to happen, and so I had, just like, brought him to my breast to have his first latch, and because I had used the pump during labor to try and stimulate the oxytocin to flow, I remember the midwife said how does that feel?
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I was like, oh my gosh, it's way stronger than the pump, and meanwhile I didn't realize what was about to happen.
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Is that what I thought was strength was actually him just clamping right down on the nipple because he had a shallow latch, and you know, the next 24 hours of cluster feeding was ahead of me.
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And then that's when everything just changed dramatically.
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But I had thought it was a cool moment, it didn't really hurt, but I was like, oh wow, it feels so much different than using the breast pump.
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And so, with the midwives in the birthing center because everything was fine.
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We are discharged after three hours and then you just head home and then it was okay.
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Well, now we're parents, I guess I'd like what do we do now?
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So it was just a lot of relaxing and then feeding my baby when he queued that he was hungry, and it was probably the next day because we got home about one o'clock in the afternoon.
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He was born around just after 9 am, three hours at the midwives.
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We were home in the early afternoon and it was a long day for him too.
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The birthing process is a lot for both, and my baby was tired, so he was probably only queuing to feed every two or three hours, that sort of standard that you hear, which really doesn't happen much beyond maybe that first day of birth.
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So things felt okay.
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It was really like when the first night came and then the second night came where the cluster feeding started, and then I was realizing that something had to be wrong because his latch was so painful.
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I didn't even want him on my body.
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I didn't want to bring him to my body.
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I would bring my shoulders to my ears like hold my breath, tense up, because I couldn't do it.
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It was painful, it was causing damage.
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But as much as I had thought that I had prepared ahead of time by reading stories and understanding, I did actually take a prenatal breastfeeding class, but I took it way too late.
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I was 38 weeks pregnant and I sat through the whole class with Braxton Hicks.
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So I did not pay attention, and I will admit that.
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So then, when the time came, all I knew was I was in pain and this shouldn't be right.
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There was actually one night where it was cluster feeding and I would do everything I possibly could to postpone the feeding, push it back.
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That can reduce milk supply.
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I didn't know that.
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I was like he can wait a little bit longer, a little bit longer, a little bit longer.
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Then he had brick dust urine.
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So he had that dark orange urine.
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That's not supposed to happen.
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Past day three.
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It was day seven and I knew that that was a red flag.
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I didn't realize that it was my doing from the night before of not wanting him to cluster feed, and so we had to go.
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We went back to the midwives and then it sort of this whole thing kind of snowballed into then going to the IBCLC at the public health unit them immediately telling me he needed to be on formula.
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My heart was broken.
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I asked about donor milk.
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They said no, he's, that's not a thing, it's just for sick babies in the NICU you can't access donor milk.
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And it was very much like he nursed, they weighed him and then it was like, oh, he needs to eat, can we give him formula?
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I was like there's no informed decision making.
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We weren't really on the same page.
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When I say we, I mean myself and the lactation consultant.
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The midwives were helpful.
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They helped me learn how to do tube feeding to give him the opportunity he needed to eat, but also to allow my body time to heal, because I was experiencing excruciating pain and damage.
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And I remember, actually, when I first called the public health unit, I said it hurts when he's breastfeeding and they said, well, that's normal.
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And I just broke down into tears.
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I was like there's no way this is normal.
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You don't understand.
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When I say this hurts, you're not listening to me.
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Well, you know it should like after a few seconds, the pain should go away.
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And I was like, no, it's continuous, it's not normal.
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And that's something that drives me crazy.
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Now is an IBCLC, because stop telling moms it's normal, it's not normal.
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And so I ended up at public health with the IBCLC and it just we were not on the same page.
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I knew I could do this.
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I had this deep desire to breastfeed my baby.
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I don't really know why, because I didn't really see it growing up.
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My sisters and I were breastfed for a short period of time.
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My mom had a lot of challenges.
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I just knew I was like I'm breastfeeding this baby, I'm supposed to breastfeed this baby, just show me how to do it.
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And there was a lot of well, your body's not gonna be able to keep up with him.
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And we worked on the same page.
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I wouldn't have the support that I felt that I should have.
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Ultimately, she did help find the root cause, and the root cause was a posterior tongue tie and a lip tie.
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That was why his lash was so shallow and so damaging, because he physically couldn't draw the nipples where it needed to be in his mouth.
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So I am grateful that that was discovered, because we had that resolved.
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We worked on those issues and then, honestly, the rest was up to me.
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But I was able to wean him off of formula by 10 weeks and then exclusively breastfeed him until he was 17 months old.
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But it was those first six weeks where it can be some of the hardest time, but it was those first six weeks where I didn't I know one was listening.
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They heard the words I was saying but they weren't listening, so the support just wasn't there.
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We worked on the same page and because of that, while they discovered the root cause and we addressed that, there was still a lot I had to do on my own.
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I had to bring up my milk supply.
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I had to figure out how to wean off of formula.
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I had to stop using bottles and tubes and have him at breast and to do that I do what most moms do and I went on the internet.
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But because I think, because my background is in nutrition and I know, like I knew how to find PubMed articles and things like that, so I knew like where to go was still a ton of information.
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I was still confused.
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But because of that I found, instead of just reading blogs, I was actually taking webinars from IBCLCs, from, like, the International Breastfeeding Center in Toronto, like I was doing these things just to learn for myself, so that I can figure out how to breastfeed this child.
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I just wanted to nurse him and then through that process I was getting so much more into it.
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I was always really into like the human body and biology and science and that part was really interesting that we grow this baby and now our body just automatically makes food for them and now we just keep growing them but they're on the outside of our body.
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Like it was really cool to me.
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And then also I thought that's not okay how I, what I just went through, there's mom should not have to go through what I just went through.
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Why should they not be listened to?
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Why shouldn't their feelings be validated?
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That's not okay.
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And the more that I had these thoughts in my head as I was learning, I was like I want to do this, I want to become a lactation consultant.
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And I was four months postpartum and the opportunity to start the education portion and learning more about the lactation physiology and that aspect came up and I took it.
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I was on Matley with my son.
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There was no guarantee of the job I left was even going to be there.
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So I said to my husband it's like I think this is what I want to do.
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He was like okay, and so yeah, four months postpartum I started.
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The process took several years, but that's when I started the process, and it was through my experience with my firstborn and the education of becoming a lactation consultant that I did things differently for baby number two, and the biggest thing that I did as far as preparation went is for labor.
00:17:51.951 --> 00:17:53.786
I actually did hypno birthing.
00:17:53.786 --> 00:17:58.611
This time I was able to have the unmedicated birth that I wanted.
00:17:58.611 --> 00:18:05.229
I just wanted another tool, just because the experience could look very different.
00:18:05.229 --> 00:18:21.449
We were having a home birth with our second, and that was the main thing that I did differently was hypno birthing, and it made such a difference, I think, because this baby again water broke, but this time labor started right away.
00:18:21.449 --> 00:18:26.710
Less than 10 minutes contraction came and then they just ramped up so fast.
00:18:26.710 --> 00:18:29.147
From water breaking to birth was three hours.
00:18:29.147 --> 00:18:30.865
The midwives barely got there in time.
00:18:30.865 --> 00:18:33.387
They're like Alex, if you have any more kids, don't leave your house.
00:18:33.387 --> 00:18:40.722
It was fast, and I do, though I do believe I think the hypno therapy had something to do with that, because it was.
00:18:40.722 --> 00:18:44.804
I just had a different mindset and I also.
00:18:44.804 --> 00:18:49.441
He was born in like two pushes, not three hours of pushing, it was.
00:18:49.441 --> 00:18:54.682
I knew what I was doing and I just had more trust in my body, and so that was something that I did.
00:18:54.682 --> 00:18:55.946
Different for labor.
00:18:56.880 --> 00:19:07.868
But one thing that I did different prenatally for the breastfeeding aspect was to collect my colostrum before he was born, because I knew if my first was tongue tied, there's a genetic link.
00:19:07.868 --> 00:19:11.625
There was a high possibility that my second would be tongue tied as well.
00:19:11.625 --> 00:19:14.704
At that point I could do the one, I could assess it myself.
00:19:14.704 --> 00:19:35.471
I was like a month away from writing the board exam to be an IV CLC, and so I was like I'm gonna collect colostrum and it was super cool, I'm gonna nerd out on that as a lactation consultant, because your body makes milk before your baby's born and this is something that also we as women aren't really educated about properly.
00:19:35.471 --> 00:19:43.685
Because we have this milk coming in and I've even consciously chosen my words when I teach prenatal classes because your milk's already there.
00:19:43.685 --> 00:19:47.967
It's just transitioning, the volume's going up, it's moving from colostrum to mature milk.
00:19:47.967 --> 00:19:50.826
It's already there 16 to 20 weeks.
00:19:50.826 --> 00:19:51.669
Your body's making it.
00:19:52.220 --> 00:20:01.929
So I was like I'm gonna collect colostrum, because if this baby has a tongue tied and if this baby can't latch, well, I'm not going to grin and bear it.
00:20:01.929 --> 00:20:05.767
I'm not gonna suck it up and tough it out, because I know breastfeeding's not supposed to be painful.
00:20:05.767 --> 00:20:24.164
So I'm gonna have a plan in place and that plan is to harvest my own colostrum so that I don't have to supplement him with formula, so that if he can't be at the breast, I have some supplement to give him while I then pump and hand express and finger feed and do all those same things again before we get the tongue tied release.
00:20:24.164 --> 00:20:35.567
But collecting colostrum is something that I would really encourage, especially if you know that there are potential challenges ahead, and for me I knew that there was a potential challenge.
00:20:35.567 --> 00:20:54.827
So it goes 36 and a half weeks I started collecting colostrum and it's just a really simple process of hand expression and just collecting a few drops, like it's really very minimal amounts because there's no baby to feed yet, so your body's not gonna produce in large volumes.
00:20:54.960 --> 00:21:06.627
But I remember the first time that I did that, even though I knew colostrum was gonna come out I'm a lactation consultant I was just like my body's already making milk, Like it was so validating.
00:21:06.627 --> 00:21:08.424
I was like I can do this again.
00:21:08.424 --> 00:21:13.766
My body can feed another baby, I can do it, I'm making milk already and then collecting that colostrum.
00:21:13.766 --> 00:21:14.983
I just saved it in syringes.
00:21:14.983 --> 00:21:15.846
We had it in the freezer.