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Jan. 8, 2024

Trishia Plett: Crafting a Birth Story Amidst Medical Challenges

Trishia Plett: Crafting a Birth Story Amidst Medical Challenges
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Season 2

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When Trishia Plett stepped into the world of motherhood, it wasn't just a birth story she was crafting—it was a testament to resilience, advocacy, and the intimate dance between autonomy and wellness. As a health and wellness ambassador, Tricia opens the doors to her deeply personal journey through the challenges and triumphs of pregnancy, especially under the shadow of PCOS and a health scare. Gripping from start to finish, her narrative is a vibrant tapestry of emotional revelations, the push for unmedicated childbirth, and the pursuit of balance in her newfound role as a parent.

Navigating the healthcare system is no small feat, and Trishia’s experience is a masterclass in standing your ground and voicing your birth preferences. She pulls back the curtain on the complexities of high-risk pregnancies and the significance of aligning her birth plan with her values. Through this episode, listeners will witness the evolution of a mother's determination, the importance of prenatal preparation, and the influence of family history on birthing expectations. Trishia’s story resonates with power and encouragement, underlining her commitment to maintaining autonomy during childbirth and the tender moments that define the transition into parenthood.

In the dynamic interplay of career and motherhood, Trishia’s return to her profession adds a new dimension to her story. We unpack the nuances of integrating work and family life, the influence of understanding one's body, and the unexpected joys of natural postpartum recovery. The conversation culminates in a heartwarming expression of gratitude and a candid reflection on societal pressures and family planning. Each chapter of this episode is a mosaic of support and insight, offering a guiding light to parents and parents-to-be on similar voyages. Join us as we celebrate personal victories and navigate the tides of family life with Trishia Plett, whose story is nothing short of inspiring.

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Medical Disclaimer:
This podcast is intended as a safe space for women to share their birth experiences. It is not intended to provide medical advice. Each woman’s medical course of action is individual and may not appropriately transfer to another similar situation. Please speak to your medical provider before making any medical decisions. Additionally, it is important to keep in mind that evidence based practice evolves as our knowledge of science improves. To the best of my ability I will attempt to present the most current ACOG and AWHONN recommendations at the time the podcast is recorded, but that may not necessarily reflect the best practices at the time the podcast is heard. Additionally, guests sharing their stories have the right to autonomy in their medical decisions, and may share their choice to go against current practice recommendations. I intend to hold space for people to share their decisions. I will attempt to share the current recommendations so that my audience is informed, but it is up to each individual to choose what is best for them.

Chapters

00:00 - Tricia's Birth Story and Career Transition

10:43 - Navigating Challenges in Pregnancy and Birth

18:17 - Empowering Birth Choices and Advocacy

25:27 - Unmedicated Birth and Autonomy

34:02 - Experiences of Contractions and Labor Positions

46:29 - Birth Experience and Postpartum Challenges

56:26 - Balancing Health and Wellness With Life

01:01:42 - Expressions of Gratitude and Future Plans

Transcript
WEBVTT

00:00:00.179 --> 00:00:03.370
Hello, Today I have with me Tricia Plett.

00:00:03.370 --> 00:00:09.528
Tricia is the mother of one and she works from home as an ambassador with a health and wellness company.

00:00:09.528 --> 00:00:12.861
She is also a certified mindset and life coach.

00:00:12.861 --> 00:00:19.164
Tricia is here today to tell her birth story and to talk about how she has managed motherhood and career.

00:00:19.164 --> 00:00:21.975
Tricia, welcome and thank you for joining me.

00:00:21.975 --> 00:00:35.240
Hey, Callie, it's so good to be here, it's so good to see you again and I am so excited because when I met you, you were working on this whole motherhood balance, all of that stuff, and I'm so excited to hear your birth story.

00:00:35.240 --> 00:00:41.301
Finally, and then we're going to talk about how you have managed this huge transition over the past year.

00:00:41.621 --> 00:00:45.048
Well, I'm excited to share my birth story because I love birth.

00:00:45.048 --> 00:00:56.771
Take it from a girl who actually hated talking about birth when she was younger and her older sister was into midwife free and her best friend was into midwife free and I would be like girls, can you just shut up?

00:00:56.771 --> 00:00:58.542
And now I'm like I get it.

00:01:00.768 --> 00:01:03.273
It's funny how we change our preferences over time.

00:01:03.273 --> 00:01:07.626
Well, let's talk about how you decided to have kids.

00:01:07.626 --> 00:01:10.111
All about your pregnancy, all that fun stuff.

00:01:10.519 --> 00:01:13.990
So we thought we wouldn't be able to have kids actually.

00:01:13.990 --> 00:01:21.281
And when we were dating I told my then boyfriend, now husband I'm like you know what, if you want to have kids, we should probably break up.

00:01:21.281 --> 00:01:25.328
He was not going to break up with me over that.

00:01:25.328 --> 00:01:26.652
He said he loved me, for me.

00:01:26.652 --> 00:01:44.109
So that was obviously he was the one then, and a few months later I was diagnosed with PCOS, which confirmed why my menstrual cycle was totally whacked, and so I just kind of set up my mind that I'm not going to have kids and I went on birth control.

00:01:44.572 --> 00:01:56.307
And you know, just because if there was the chance of getting pregnant, we didn't want to have a baby too soon in our relationship and I got off of birth control out of necessity.

00:01:56.307 --> 00:01:57.609
I didn't want to go off of it.

00:01:57.609 --> 00:01:58.171
I loved it.

00:01:58.171 --> 00:02:01.926
It gave me energy and put me in a good mood all the time.

00:02:01.926 --> 00:02:06.724
But I got a pulmonary embolism and so I had no choice but to go off of birth control.

00:02:06.724 --> 00:02:11.356
So that opened up the possibility of pregnancy.

00:02:11.356 --> 00:02:14.003
But we were also strongly advised to never get pregnant.

00:02:14.003 --> 00:02:17.872
We got pregnant six months later without any complications.

00:02:17.872 --> 00:02:25.187
Now I had a consultant with my family doctor about it and she had confirmed that my blood work was fine and I was safe to get pregnant.

00:02:25.187 --> 00:02:27.657
And we got pregnant without trying.

00:02:27.657 --> 00:02:50.586
So that was sort of terrifying and also awesome, because I was still afraid of the process of birth and so I was like I'll never be ready to get pregnant and my husband wanted to start having kids because I'm 30 now and he's like we need to start and I'm like, yeah, but I don't know if I want to and like it costs so much money and I just I don't want anything passing through my vagina.

00:02:50.586 --> 00:02:51.215
That's awful.

00:02:51.215 --> 00:03:11.973
And we got pregnant and I wasn't checking my cycle like I should have been and I remember very clearly checking my app and I went to my husband and said, oh shit, we're probably pregnant and I dared not be on a stick for like three weeks and I got a massage and the massage therapist she's like is there anything going on with your hormones?

00:03:11.973 --> 00:03:12.860
And I'm like I don't know.

00:03:12.860 --> 00:03:13.962
Like I might be pregnant.

00:03:13.962 --> 00:03:15.788
She's like you might be pregnant and you don't know.

00:03:15.788 --> 00:03:18.026
I'm like, yeah, I just don't feel like taking a test.

00:03:18.026 --> 00:03:22.143
And she's like you need to take a test because something is going on.

00:03:22.143 --> 00:03:26.656
So I took a test the next day and I was indeed pregnant.

00:03:26.656 --> 00:03:30.125
So that was kind of exciting and also totally terrifying.

00:03:30.406 --> 00:03:33.231
So then, how was your pregnancy Pregnancy started out?

00:03:33.231 --> 00:03:33.772
Easy.

00:03:33.772 --> 00:03:38.632
Actually, the whole pregnancy was overall, like easy, except it wasn't because I had complications.

00:03:38.632 --> 00:03:42.856
But you know, like my body just did its thing and I was relaxed about it.

00:03:42.856 --> 00:03:47.778
In the whole nine months of being pregnant maybe spent 30 seconds being afraid of birth.

00:03:47.778 --> 00:03:48.819
That's a change.

00:03:48.819 --> 00:03:50.306
It's like what happened to me.

00:03:50.306 --> 00:03:52.459
I'm like I think it's because I got into and it's my body.

00:03:52.459 --> 00:03:53.675
I'm like okay, I'm pregnant.

00:03:53.675 --> 00:04:04.526
This is not the first time somebody got pregnant and people have been doing this for forever, so I can do it too, right, Did you have to do anything about the pulmonary embolism?

00:04:04.566 --> 00:04:06.574
Did you have to be on any medications, or were they just?

00:04:06.574 --> 00:04:08.582
You were cleared because of your blood work.

00:04:09.185 --> 00:04:09.406
Well.

00:04:09.406 --> 00:04:15.384
So that's a good question, because I wasn't aware that if I ever got pregnant I needed to be on thinners.

00:04:15.384 --> 00:04:22.084
So I actually did have to go on to blood thinners, but I didn't find out until a few months in.

00:04:22.084 --> 00:04:27.642
So in the first part of pregnancy I had some spotting, which you know it was terrifying.

00:04:27.642 --> 00:04:29.427
I had to get some ultrasounds done.

00:04:29.427 --> 00:04:31.762
That was sort of dramatic in itself.

00:04:31.762 --> 00:04:41.987
So I was going to have a midwife and I wanted to have a midwife that I could pay through insurance, because you know that would save me $6,000.

00:04:41.987 --> 00:04:51.833
And so I found one, a nurse midwife at a hospital, not the one I usually go to, but a different one, and it was like equal distance.

00:04:51.833 --> 00:04:53.545
So I'm like that works.

00:04:53.545 --> 00:04:56.197
So I set up an appointment to meet with this midwife.

00:04:56.197 --> 00:05:06.038
Then I had the spotting and then I had to go for an ultrasound in my family doctor practices out of the hospital that the nurse midwife was at, and so she set up an ultrasound for me at that hospital.

00:05:06.298 --> 00:05:09.185
I almost got kicked out of the hospital by security.

00:05:09.185 --> 00:05:17.132
That was during all of the very tight mask regulations and I was like stressed out because I'm like I'm having a miscarriage, and then I had to.

00:05:17.132 --> 00:05:20.009
They had the regulation of wearing the N95 masks.

00:05:20.009 --> 00:05:32.418
I was okay with, like the surgical mask, but the N95, I started to like hyperventilate and so I was like I can't do this and so I took the mask off and security is like you're going to have to leave, and so that was terrifying.

00:05:32.478 --> 00:05:53.940
I'm like I'm never going back to this hospital because I cannot have that experience every time I go in for an appointment because that's going to probably make my blood pressure higher and just like everything's going to be bad and even if I can be prepared for it, like I still have that trauma response to walking in those doors and I'm like I can't go to that hospital for delivering my baby.

00:05:53.940 --> 00:06:01.547
So I was on the hunt for finding a new midwife, because at this point I still didn't know about being on blood thinners.

00:06:01.547 --> 00:06:04.398
Everything checked out but there was a little bit of a.

00:06:04.398 --> 00:06:06.026
I never full understood what was going on.

00:06:06.026 --> 00:06:10.266
It's kind of like a blood sack or something and they're like either it clears up or it doesn't.

00:06:10.266 --> 00:06:15.108
Either the baby doesn't develop properly or it does Like there's really nothing we can do about it.

00:06:15.108 --> 00:06:17.057
It's probably okay, just don't have sex.

00:06:17.459 --> 00:06:19.526
So was it a subchoreonic bleed.

00:06:19.526 --> 00:06:20.550
Is that what they called it?

00:06:21.033 --> 00:06:23.482
It was a big word, it was a really big word.

00:06:23.541 --> 00:06:27.235
It maybe was that just like a little blood pool in your placenta?

00:06:27.235 --> 00:06:28.278
That sometimes?

00:06:28.519 --> 00:06:31.165
Yeah, I think something like that, Like it was.

00:06:31.165 --> 00:06:34.132
I was also so stressed out about the whole mask thing.

00:06:34.132 --> 00:06:38.971
I actually did get into the hospital without the N95 because triage told security to back off.

00:06:40.403 --> 00:06:45.680
Good, because that's not evidence-based, that whole N95, you should be fit tested for an N95.

00:06:45.680 --> 00:06:49.519
So to make everybody wear an N95 regardless of their medical status is pretty ridiculous.

00:06:50.463 --> 00:06:50.644
Yeah.

00:06:50.824 --> 00:06:59.136
In my opinion, that's what all my friends told me, who were like I have a friend who was a CNA during that whole time and they were fitted every week for a new N85.

00:06:59.136 --> 00:07:01.142
And she's like why were they making you wear one?

00:07:01.142 --> 00:07:03.509
I'm like that's just the regulation at that hospital.

00:07:03.509 --> 00:07:06.108
Yeah, triage really set up for me.

00:07:06.108 --> 00:07:12.810
My husband pretty much had to stand between me and security and just basically tell him listen, she's having a panic attack right now and I need you to back off.

00:07:12.810 --> 00:07:14.543
Yeah, it was awful.

00:07:14.543 --> 00:07:17.007
I'm like I can't go there and I knew that.

00:07:17.007 --> 00:07:28.940
The other hospital, the one that I have been to before, like when I went for my pulmonary embolism, they did the surgical mask and I've usually been comfortable in those and I'm like, well, obviously that is my hospital of choice.

00:07:28.940 --> 00:07:30.826
Going forward, yeah, that's frustrating.

00:07:30.846 --> 00:07:31.930
That that's how you had to choose.

00:07:32.521 --> 00:07:41.942
Yeah, but I'm glad it happened in the beginning, honestly like, rather than and I'm glad that my husband was with me rather than me going in by myself oh yeah, I don't know what I would have done.

00:07:41.942 --> 00:07:43.166
I would have left.

00:07:43.487 --> 00:07:49.250
Yeah, so then that was that at the appointment where they found the subchorionic hemorrhage.

00:07:49.250 --> 00:07:54.471
Yes, okay, and then you didn't go back to that hospital after that, or did you go a couple of times?

00:07:54.612 --> 00:07:56.382
No, I never went back to that hospital.

00:07:56.382 --> 00:07:58.730
I decided to go private with a midwife.

00:07:58.730 --> 00:08:02.045
So I called a bunch of midwife practices, like nobody called me back.

00:08:02.045 --> 00:08:12.211
And then there was this random doogaloo who called me back and she's like yeah, so we don't really do insurance, but we would love to meet with you and just talk about what your goals are and talk about birth.

00:08:12.211 --> 00:08:16.187
And we just chatted on the phone for a while and I just pulled into work and we talked for like I don't know 20 minutes.

00:08:16.187 --> 00:08:17.471
I'm like this lady is awesome.

00:08:17.471 --> 00:08:21.810
I mean they don't take my insurance, but I'm going to go check these people out.

00:08:22.091 --> 00:08:24.608
So I confirmed with my husband if it was okay.

00:08:24.608 --> 00:08:27.762
We talked about the price and I set up an appointment to meet with a midwife.

00:08:27.762 --> 00:08:34.605
And I met with a midwife and we left the appointment and my husband's like that didn't even feel like an appointment.

00:08:34.605 --> 00:08:39.423
I said exactly that's why you go to the midwife, because he does all of the things.

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But you feel like you're at home and I just I was so much peace about him, like I'm so glad this worked out this way.

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Like it sucks that that other thing didn't work, but this is going to be so amazing and so relaxing and so much peace around being pregnant, and my husband was looking forward to it, which is interesting because I had actually wanted a home birth and I had been telling him for years that I was going to have a home birth, and he's like no, you're not.

00:09:05.568 --> 00:09:11.297
And I'm like, yes, I will, because all of these things I started listening to them off and he's he finally was on board with it.

00:09:11.317 --> 00:09:14.533
So he's like, yes, of course you can have a midwife, we're going to do a home birth and all the things.

00:09:15.155 --> 00:09:37.453
I don't remember the timeline exactly, but I only had that one appointment with that midwife and a few weeks later I was working at home baking cookies, actually on a Sunday afternoon, and I said to my husband you know, my left arm isn't really feeling great and it's kind of warming my bicep and I'm not sure if I should be concerned about it or if it's nothing.

00:09:37.453 --> 00:09:44.826
So we talked about whether or not we should go to the hospital and I'm like it's not too bad, I'll think about it and I just have to like this unsettled ceiling in my gut.

00:09:44.826 --> 00:09:53.851
And so I'm like as soon as I'm done making cookies and I was almost done I'm like let's go to the hospital, because I'm like I have to finish what I'm doing, because if it is what I think it is, I'm staying there for the night.

00:09:53.851 --> 00:10:02.052
So we went into the hospital and when you go to the ER and you have like a blood clot history and then you tell them that you're having symptoms of blood clots.

00:10:02.052 --> 00:10:04.075
They get you through pretty fast, at least here.

00:10:04.501 --> 00:10:04.701
Yeah.

00:10:04.903 --> 00:10:05.224
I do.

00:10:05.224 --> 00:10:07.351
That's not gonna take it lightly.

00:10:07.351 --> 00:10:08.756
I don't take it lightly.

00:10:08.756 --> 00:10:10.682
My husband's like just tell him you're having chest pains.

00:10:10.682 --> 00:10:15.705
I'm like, no, I'm not having chest pains, I just have discomfort in my bicep.

00:10:15.705 --> 00:10:26.628
So they triaged me super fast and they found a clot in my left bicep and in my right subclavian, and so I immediately was put on live and aux injections.

00:10:26.628 --> 00:10:33.142
And somebody asked me you know, didn't you know that you needed to be on these when you're pregnant because of your blood clot history?

00:10:33.142 --> 00:10:35.549
And I'm like, no, they didn't tell me.

00:10:35.549 --> 00:10:39.643
So I had, you know, a few months of bliss and no needles.

00:10:39.643 --> 00:10:47.881
And then I had injections twice a day, every 12 hours for the rest of the pregnancy and six weeks after.

00:10:47.881 --> 00:10:53.727
I am terrified of needles, so I never gave myself one injection.

00:10:53.727 --> 00:10:57.917
My husband did them all, or one of my friends.

00:10:58.230 --> 00:10:59.836
That's good that you had somebody to do it for you.

00:11:00.129 --> 00:11:00.552
My husband.

00:11:00.552 --> 00:11:05.285
One time he decided to do like a really ridiculous thing and do one while driving.

00:11:05.285 --> 00:11:06.369
It all worked out.

00:11:06.369 --> 00:11:08.417
I promise we got nothing going on.

00:11:08.809 --> 00:11:10.735
Let's just give you a shot while I'm driving.

00:11:10.777 --> 00:11:11.097
Yeah.

00:11:11.097 --> 00:11:15.118
So I pinched my skin and he shoved in the needle and did the thing, stabbed you.

00:11:15.118 --> 00:11:18.836
Yeah, it was all fine and good, but I'm like I'm never doing that again.

00:11:18.836 --> 00:11:21.355
Don't try this at home, don't do it.

00:11:21.355 --> 00:11:25.120
It was terrifying for me to feel my skin pop and I'm like, nope, never doing that again.

00:11:25.120 --> 00:11:33.134
It also meant I couldn't go away without him and he always had to be home in the morning and in the evening to do the shots.

00:11:34.330 --> 00:11:37.034
So then, were you able to continue with that midwife?

00:11:37.034 --> 00:11:39.299
No, given the risks.

00:11:39.299 --> 00:11:39.801
Okay.

00:11:39.801 --> 00:11:40.663
So then what happened?

00:11:41.871 --> 00:11:48.677
So I was in the hospital, I think for three nights for observation to make sure that my shots were the right dose and stuff.

00:11:48.677 --> 00:12:06.197
And I met the local, some of the local OBGYN doctors, and seriously everything just crumbled and fell down and all of my dreams for pregnancy just crashed and they told me you have to find a doctor, you can have a midwife, you're going to have a hospital birth and you are.

00:12:06.197 --> 00:12:08.442
I think they even told me I'd probably have to get induced.

00:12:08.442 --> 00:12:14.278
Like they just loaded me up on all the bad stories and I mean like I think they were just doing their job.

00:12:14.278 --> 00:12:20.720
I know they were just doing their job, but it wasn't delivered very well and I'm like how do I find a doctor?

00:12:20.720 --> 00:12:22.596
And they're like you need a doctor right now.

00:12:22.596 --> 00:12:23.815
I can't believe you don't have one.

00:12:23.815 --> 00:12:26.835
I'm like duh, because I have a midwife, that's why I don't have a doctor.

00:12:27.029 --> 00:12:32.822
I met one of the high risk OBGYN doctors from here and he was the one who actually presented all of the things.

00:12:32.822 --> 00:12:36.797
So he didn't start off on a good fit for me and something just fell kind of off about him.

00:12:36.797 --> 00:12:43.562
I found out after I had the baby that he actually has the highest cesarean rates here.

00:12:43.562 --> 00:12:45.937
So you know I wasn't going for cesarean.

00:12:45.937 --> 00:12:52.658
So maybe I don't know, like maybe that's why we weren't quite getting along, because our maybe our vision for birth would have been different.

00:12:52.658 --> 00:12:58.220
I was very relieved to find one more doctor that was qualified to take me on.

00:12:58.220 --> 00:12:59.863
There was only the two, okay.

00:13:00.671 --> 00:13:04.000
So you needed a high risk OB, or did you also go to maternal fetal medicine?

00:13:04.610 --> 00:13:08.177
I went to maternal fetal medicine and I had a high risk OB.

00:13:08.177 --> 00:13:08.918
Oh, okay.

00:13:09.519 --> 00:13:10.140
Oh yeah, I had.

00:13:10.140 --> 00:13:16.139
So then it was the high risk OB that had the high cesarean rate that you decided to not go with.

00:13:16.139 --> 00:13:19.636
Yes, so then how was it with the one that you chose?

00:13:19.636 --> 00:13:21.174
It was really good.

00:13:21.669 --> 00:13:26.619
So you know how like the system works, like there's like six or 10 doctors who work in the same practice.

00:13:26.619 --> 00:13:31.059
You hire one doctor but you see them like never.

00:13:31.059 --> 00:13:40.961
So that was happening and I was struggling with it really bad, especially because I was so I have to say, like I was really angry about being on blood thinners and about the change of plans.

00:13:40.961 --> 00:13:43.457
Like there was a month of just simmering anger.

00:13:43.457 --> 00:13:48.390
I wasn't always aware of it, but it was definitely there and I'm glad that I dealt with it before birth.

00:13:48.390 --> 00:13:49.956
But anyways, back to the doctor.

00:13:49.956 --> 00:13:52.095
So I hired a doctor.

00:13:52.095 --> 00:13:53.475
I was recommended to her.

00:13:53.475 --> 00:14:04.753
I'm not really sure how I decided that she was my doctor, but I met with her one time and she said that because a local birthing center closed down, like a lot of those clients are coming to this practice.

00:14:04.753 --> 00:14:07.100
And she said we try to do the best care we possibly can.

00:14:07.100 --> 00:14:19.022
Since you wanted a midwife, we know that you probably wanted the most natural approach to birth and labor and so we're going to respect that and we just had like that open conversation was really good.

00:14:19.022 --> 00:14:23.798
But also one time I had a conversation with her and I said I'm not really liking my appointments.

00:14:23.798 --> 00:14:29.774
I said I'm coming in here and I'm always seeing somebody different and they don't even know my case.

00:14:29.774 --> 00:14:31.434
It's like they're not reading my file.

00:14:31.434 --> 00:14:38.714
And so we just really had a really open conversation about that and really established a mutual respect between us.

00:14:39.289 --> 00:14:45.414
She told me some of her experiences with birthing and she said, if at all possible, I want you to be able to have a vaginal birth.

00:14:45.414 --> 00:14:51.642
She says if I think that you need a C-section, it's going to be because you actually really do need one.

00:14:51.642 --> 00:15:01.640
I am not going to recommend one just because I want to go home and have supper Right and I'm sure that, like honestly, there's probably way more doctors out there like that.

00:15:01.640 --> 00:15:16.028
But I needed to have that conversation because I was having an ultrasound every month at the maternal fetal medicine, which was a completely different practice, and then I was having my OB appointments and I'm at the end of pregnancy.

00:15:16.028 --> 00:15:28.557
I was having three appointments a week and I just needed to know what I was allowed to do and what you know like which things could I say no to and would my doctor respect that?

00:15:28.817 --> 00:15:30.601
Yeah, that's important.

00:15:30.982 --> 00:15:53.159
Yeah, and like everybody needs to know that, Prenatal classes were really helpful in educating me and knowing, you know what was potentially going to come for me, what a hospital birth could look like, what it looks like when you're considered high risk in a hospital birth, and I also hired a doula who actually taught the prenatal classes and she just she was just really open and honest and she said you know, Trisha, this is probably what it's going to look like.

00:15:53.649 --> 00:16:03.576
You're probably going to have to get Potosin at some point because they will want you to deliver your placenta within 30 minutes of delivering the baby, and so you're probably going to have to get Potosin.

00:16:03.576 --> 00:16:08.176
You're going to have to be monitored 24 seven, which you can probably have a wireless monitor, but you're going to have to monitor.

00:16:08.176 --> 00:16:11.216
And I'm like I just don't want an IV line.

00:16:11.216 --> 00:16:13.638
She's like you're going to have to have an IV line.

00:16:13.638 --> 00:16:26.783
You might not be hooked up, but you're going to have to have an IV line in place just in case something goes wrong, and I just I'm like, how am I going to do labor with an IV in place?

00:16:26.783 --> 00:16:29.917
I was just dreading it, Like I had all these horror stories in my mind about it.

00:16:30.289 --> 00:16:32.616
But she was explaining the way that birth was going to go down.

00:16:33.690 --> 00:16:35.376
And I really, I really needed that.

00:16:35.376 --> 00:16:43.235
And it was actually at a prenatal class where I realized that I had a lot of anger about my hospital birth coming up.

00:16:44.350 --> 00:17:14.582
I'm not sure what was said and I made this under my breath comment and I was just like, oh my gosh, I am so angry and now everybody knows I love that you're aware of that, because part of the reason that I'm doing this podcast and then I'm birth coaching is because that is pretty common, because birth isn't straightforward All the time, especially if there's medical complications, and it is so easy to begin to feel out of control and to have anger and resentment because of that.

00:17:15.190 --> 00:17:32.557
And so I really want to help mom's focus on how to I don't want to say regain control, because what do we really have control over in life To regain autonomy and continuing to be a part of the decision-making process, even though things aren't going the exact way that you pictured.

00:17:32.557 --> 00:17:43.113
Because it's not like if you go in for a routine procedure, if you're going to get out your tonsils it's pretty straightforward they can tell you exactly how it's going to go With labor and delivery.

00:17:43.113 --> 00:17:44.156
We really have no idea.

00:17:44.156 --> 00:17:48.977
There are so many things that could happen and it is really easy to feel out of control.

00:17:48.977 --> 00:18:02.375
The overarching feeling that I get from mom's is anger and resentment, and it's really hard to work through that, and I'm really glad that you had the opportunity to work through that before your delivery, because otherwise I feel like that's what leads to trauma.

00:18:02.635 --> 00:18:04.641
Yeah, yeah, I've thought about that too.

00:18:04.641 --> 00:18:07.442
I'm like this is like totally the end of the story.

00:18:07.442 --> 00:18:11.016
But like I have to say it, a doctor told me at my six weeks appointment.

00:18:11.016 --> 00:18:14.914
She said your birth was the most peaceful birth I ever attended.

00:18:14.914 --> 00:18:22.955
I just know that that is like a testimony to dealing with my anger and my resentment before that.

00:18:23.478 --> 00:18:25.596
Yeah, you were able to grieve the birth that you wanted.

00:18:25.977 --> 00:18:26.157
Yeah.

00:18:26.930 --> 00:18:29.355
And move forward with the birth that you were presented.

00:18:29.355 --> 00:18:30.338
Yeah, that's awesome.

00:18:31.490 --> 00:18:35.969
That's an empowering thing because once I finally dealt with it, I could well.

00:18:35.969 --> 00:18:38.377
So I had to visit the hospital a lot of times.

00:18:38.377 --> 00:18:41.799
So one of the times I went to the hospital I actually had a three hour nose bleed.

00:18:41.799 --> 00:18:48.286
That was terrifying and you know they couldn't do anything to stop the noise bleed because I was on blood centers and that was early in pregnancy.

00:18:48.286 --> 00:18:52.138
And I would tell myself when I went to the hospital this is a safe space.

00:18:52.138 --> 00:18:58.031
That is what I told myself like anytime that I had to go to the hospital or have a doctor's appointment.

00:18:58.031 --> 00:18:59.115
Like this is a safe space.

00:18:59.115 --> 00:19:03.875
These people care about me, they have my best interest in mind and I just did that on repeat.

00:19:03.875 --> 00:19:04.719
This is a safe space.

00:19:04.719 --> 00:19:05.814
This is a safe space.

00:19:06.210 --> 00:19:08.557
And if you don't feel safe with someone, you're entitled to speak up.

00:19:08.576 --> 00:19:14.354
Yes, Honestly, the OB doctor who told me you know you're high risk and it's going to be awful, who has the high caesarean rates.

00:19:14.354 --> 00:19:20.420
I didn't feel safe with him and there was actually a different OB that I saw Funny story.

00:19:20.420 --> 00:19:24.378
So I'm going to be all over the place, Okay, but I'm just going to say this, that's okay.

00:19:24.378 --> 00:19:30.894
Towards the end of pregnancy I had my last ultrasound with the maternal fetal medicine and they said, well, everything is textbook Perfect.

00:19:30.894 --> 00:19:33.381
It's beautiful, Like everything is amazing.

00:19:33.381 --> 00:19:36.298
I've never seen anything so beautiful in my life, whatever, whatever.

00:19:36.298 --> 00:19:38.537
And she says, okay, we're going to schedule you for an induction.

00:19:39.390 --> 00:19:43.799
And I said, I said I'm not getting induced unless if there's a medical emergency.

00:19:43.799 --> 00:19:49.115
And she kind of rolled her eyes at me and she says, well, I guess I'll make a note about that, but you do need to get induced.

00:19:49.115 --> 00:19:52.986
So I had a conversation with my doctor and she's like, no, you don't.

00:19:52.986 --> 00:19:56.458
If everything is fine, I support you to not be induced.

00:19:56.458 --> 00:20:15.541
I said, in the event that I have to be induced, I will not be induced before, like August 23rd or something, Cause my mom had a baby on the 21st of August, the year her mom passed away and her mom's birthday was the 23rd of August and I just thought you know what I'm due close at the same time.

00:20:15.541 --> 00:20:25.157
So if I have to be induced, let's see if we can hit birth on the 23rd, just for the sake of if we have to if we have to plan it associated with trauma.

00:20:25.239 --> 00:20:31.752
Yeah, right, I would get a note about that just for like note purposes, because that would have put me a week overdue.

00:20:31.752 --> 00:20:38.777
And there was a doctor that I didn't particularly get along with super well, like it seemed like we were always passing each other.

00:20:38.777 --> 00:20:42.539
I'm sure she's super professional, but our personalities didn't go well together.

00:20:42.539 --> 00:20:51.556
I was at work and I got a notification on my Google calendar that I had an appointment at noon and I'm like why I don't have an appointment today?

00:20:51.556 --> 00:20:55.516
I didn't schedule this when it's going on, and I said induction appointment.

00:20:55.516 --> 00:20:56.534
I'm like what the heck?

00:20:56.534 --> 00:20:59.835
I didn't plan this, I didn't sign off on this.

00:20:59.835 --> 00:21:04.000
And so I called the OB office and I'm like what is this appointment?

00:21:04.000 --> 00:21:05.756
Because I'm not planning to show up for it.

00:21:05.756 --> 00:21:08.354
I'm at work and they're like yeah, you have an induction.

00:21:08.354 --> 00:21:10.557
I'm like, well, I'm not going to it.

00:21:11.078 --> 00:21:13.904
It took a long time to get that thing canceled.

00:21:13.904 --> 00:21:18.765
There was so many like okay, we'll talk to this person, talk to this person, no, talk to that other person.

00:21:18.765 --> 00:21:26.987
And it was this whole run around, and so finally it all got canceled and we talked about what we will do once we hit closer to 42 weeks.

00:21:26.987 --> 00:21:31.946
What are we going to put in place to make sure that you do have this baby at 42 weeks or before.

00:21:31.946 --> 00:21:36.991
And then I finally had it all canceled and my doctor called me and I'm like, oh shoot, now I'm in trouble.

00:21:36.991 --> 00:21:40.364
And she said you are never obligated to show up for an induction.

00:21:40.423 --> 00:21:44.502
If you did not want one, yeah, and she said you do not need to be induced.

00:21:44.502 --> 00:21:57.843
She says, obviously, if you go to 42 weeks, I think that you should be and I think it would be good to put an induction on the schedule, just because that way you're there and you don't have to take away somebody else's appointment.

00:21:57.843 --> 00:22:06.593
If you have to be emergency induced, I said, okay, we can schedule one for the 31st, which I put me at 42 weeks.

00:22:06.593 --> 00:22:10.222
So we scheduled an induction for that day and if I hit that point then I would hit that point.

00:22:10.222 --> 00:22:13.954
But I was going to do everything in my power to not make it to 42 weeks.

00:22:15.038 --> 00:22:30.324
But, like, my doctor empowered me in that decision where she's like you don't need to, but we should probably put something on the schedule and then if you don't make that appointment, somebody else gets it and somebody else is happy because they get their appointments to do what they thought how many weeks did they put you down for that?

00:22:30.324 --> 00:22:34.221
Original 38, I think, or it was, maybe, I don't even.

00:22:34.221 --> 00:22:37.428
It's awful, I forget at what time my baby was born.

00:22:37.654 --> 00:22:38.857
So that's funny.

00:22:38.857 --> 00:22:44.308
It's just interesting because it just shows the what I call the patriarchal culture of obstetrics.

00:22:44.308 --> 00:22:45.817
So it's like you're going to do this.

00:22:45.817 --> 00:22:58.723
Like how do you, how is it that you would schedule a procedure for a grown person, an adult with autonomy, and not tell them, and not have them agree to it?

00:22:58.723 --> 00:23:00.286
Just you will come do this?

00:23:00.286 --> 00:23:05.325
That's insanity, especially if your doctor had already said there's no medical reason for it.

00:23:05.325 --> 00:23:11.827
And I can't comment because I am not a doctor B, I wasn't there for your entire pregnancy and I haven't read your medical file.

00:23:11.827 --> 00:23:22.634
But if your doctor is okay, if everything looks good and your doctor is okay with you waiting, then why would somebody go in behind your doctor's back and just automatically schedule something?

00:23:22.634 --> 00:23:23.596
It baits me.

00:23:24.117 --> 00:23:24.920
So fun fact.

00:23:24.980 --> 00:23:25.981
I told my doctor.

00:23:26.001 --> 00:23:33.926
When she calls me, I said, well, I really hope you're on call when I go in labor, like it really established that I really wanted her to be the doctor attending my birth.

00:23:33.926 --> 00:23:37.682
So, fun fact, she did attend my birth but she was not on call.

00:23:37.682 --> 00:23:41.449
The doctor on call was the one who had scheduled my induction, my God.

00:23:41.449 --> 00:23:46.287
So it would have probably not gone over great if she had been the one attending my birth.

00:23:46.287 --> 00:23:53.355
Yeah, so now I do understand all the people who talk about you know, like you can you can fire a doctor and all of those things, which sounds severe.

00:23:53.355 --> 00:23:55.770
I kind of get that.

00:23:55.770 --> 00:23:56.275
There's a place for that.

00:23:56.919 --> 00:23:59.674
There is because if they're taking away your autonomy, then they shouldn't be a doctor.

00:24:00.336 --> 00:24:02.365
And for some people that's going to make them feel safe.

00:24:02.365 --> 00:24:04.954
For me, it was just like I don't feel safe with you.

00:24:05.538 --> 00:24:07.085
Yeah, and that's totally reasonable.

00:24:07.085 --> 00:24:09.315
So I'm assuming you went into labor.

00:24:09.877 --> 00:24:10.740
I did yeah.

00:24:10.740 --> 00:24:15.443
So I worked full time right up until 41 weeks and two days and then I decided you know what?

00:24:15.443 --> 00:24:17.595
I'm tired of people asking me why I'm still at work.

00:24:17.595 --> 00:24:19.994
It happened like every day, multiple times in a day.

00:24:19.994 --> 00:24:23.755
I worked at a fairly big organization, so there was a lot of people.

00:24:23.755 --> 00:24:28.775
It's crazy how many people think that they're allowed to talk to pregnant women disrespectfully or ask them personal questions.

00:24:28.775 --> 00:24:30.241
That's none of their business.

00:24:30.241 --> 00:24:32.755
But anyways, they were like oh, you're still at work, why are you still here?

00:24:32.755 --> 00:24:36.664
I'm like because I don't know when this baby is going to be Right.

00:24:36.746 --> 00:24:37.315
And also I need money.

00:24:38.301 --> 00:24:40.115
Yeah, and you guys are covering my insurance.

00:24:40.115 --> 00:24:41.861
So I kind of got to stick around.

00:24:41.861 --> 00:24:56.275
I had coworkers who were like you are so dumb for wanting a natural birth, you're so naive, c-section is the way to go and I'm like, okay, blocking you out because I don't want people cutting my stomach unless if I absolutely need to have a dime.

00:24:56.275 --> 00:24:59.685
So I was also determined to be unmedicated.

00:24:59.685 --> 00:25:04.186
And they're like you were so out of your mind you want an epidural.

00:25:04.186 --> 00:25:05.275
Every mom wants an epidural.

00:25:05.275 --> 00:25:07.221
They're like you don't know how bad it's going to hurt.

00:25:07.221 --> 00:25:08.305
I said, of course I don't know.

00:25:08.305 --> 00:25:10.358
That's why I'm practicing breathing.

00:25:10.358 --> 00:25:14.387
And somebody's like you're going to forget all of that breathing that you ever practiced.

00:25:14.387 --> 00:25:16.480
I'm like that's why I'm practicing.

00:25:16.580 --> 00:25:22.707
At work, when I'm stressed out, I practice breathing around the clock, pretty much because work was so stressful.

00:25:22.707 --> 00:25:28.028
I'm like, okay, here's a prime example to learn to relax my body in the midst of stress.

00:25:28.028 --> 00:25:29.317
So we are breathing.

00:25:29.317 --> 00:25:32.343
I was listening to hypno birthing tracks around the clock.

00:25:32.343 --> 00:25:35.828
Just practicing, just relaxing my body, relaxing my body.

00:25:35.828 --> 00:25:54.240
That's when I did a work all the time and then the evenings we did perennial stretches almost every night just to help with hopefully avoiding tearing, and so I also practice breathing through that, because it was so uncomfortable and I'm like, if you tell me, I'm going to forget how to breathe.

00:25:54.240 --> 00:25:57.929
I'm going to be super intentional to make it second nature.

00:25:57.929 --> 00:26:09.527
And in one of my conversations with my doctor about induction versus not induction she said just so you know, if you don't schedule an induction you cannot have an epidural because you're on blood thinners.

00:26:09.815 --> 00:26:12.644
I don't know, because you have to be off of the blood thinners for 12 hours.

00:26:12.755 --> 00:26:14.858
She said I know you want a natural birth.

00:26:14.858 --> 00:26:43.566
I am just telling you that this is going to force you into not even having an option, and that was sort of terrifying, but at the same time it was just like I just know that I am going to have to trust my body this whole entire process, because there is no out and if my doctor says you have to have a C-section, it's actually going to be an emergency and I am going to say yes, ma'am, and we are going to do this thing?

00:26:43.694 --> 00:26:45.681
Yeah, and if it hadn't been 12, what was it?

00:26:45.681 --> 00:26:47.885
12 hours that you had to be off the blood thinners?

00:26:47.885 --> 00:26:51.826
Yes, so if it hadn't been 12 hours, then you would have to have general anesthesia.

00:26:52.035 --> 00:26:54.621
Yeah, and she just she, she prepared me for that.

00:26:54.621 --> 00:26:57.708
She said this is what's going to happen if something goes wrong.

00:26:57.708 --> 00:27:03.667
She says we're going to avoid it as much as we can and we're going to do whatever we can to make it not happen.

00:27:03.667 --> 00:27:08.446
But I want you to know that if you don't get induced, then you can't have an epidural.

00:27:08.446 --> 00:27:14.317
And I'm like, okay, this is what I have been preparing for this whole entire time, so I'm a good fit for it.

00:27:14.317 --> 00:27:22.615
This is what I wanted and it sort of was empowering, quite honestly, because I had worked so hard to prepare my mind space for doing it unmedicated.

00:27:22.615 --> 00:27:25.862
Also, like my mom had 10 kids okay, I'm her second one.

00:27:26.001 --> 00:27:27.105
I was born by cesarean.

00:27:27.105 --> 00:27:34.387
Everybody else was a VBAC, so she's pretty much a superwoman and she was never medicated, so that was normal for me.

00:27:34.387 --> 00:27:38.944
I, until I was 25, I didn't really know that medicated birth was a thing.

00:27:38.944 --> 00:27:44.462
I'm so naive but I was like what's the excitement around medication?

00:27:44.462 --> 00:27:48.244
People have been doing this for thousands of years, all the animals do it and they're so relaxed.

00:27:48.244 --> 00:27:49.574
I mean, that's where I watched birth.

00:27:49.574 --> 00:27:51.779
A lot of girls grow up on a farm and that's just what they did.

00:27:51.779 --> 00:27:58.006
And maybe it sounds like naive and dumb, but I tried to just lean into my body and what I was created for.

00:27:58.006 --> 00:27:59.839
So then, when did you go into?

00:27:59.880 --> 00:28:00.643
labor, do you remember?

00:28:01.055 --> 00:28:04.603
I went into labor at 41 weeks and three days.

00:28:04.603 --> 00:28:14.555
So the day after I was done with my job I was so bummed, I was looking forward to being at home and just loving pregnancy, because I loved being pregnant.

00:28:14.555 --> 00:28:20.147
I hated the needles, but I, you know, 40 weeks came around and I'm like pregnancy is so fun.

00:28:20.147 --> 00:28:23.365
I could do this for another several months.

00:28:23.365 --> 00:28:24.490
Like this is so awesome.

00:28:24.490 --> 00:28:25.172
I was huge.

00:28:25.172 --> 00:28:27.858
I gained like 60 pounds, but I loved it.

00:28:27.858 --> 00:28:29.201
I loved being pregnant.

00:28:29.201 --> 00:28:31.247
It was so fun to just be me and the baby.

00:28:31.247 --> 00:28:38.483
And everywhere we went we went together, which, of course, sometimes I'm like man, I just want to be my own person, but like overall, it was the best thing in my life.

00:28:38.483 --> 00:28:39.205
I loved it.

00:28:39.405 --> 00:28:41.942
My husband and I, we went shopping at Menards.

00:28:41.942 --> 00:28:47.362
We walked through Menards for hours and hours and I don't know how I made such good decisions when I was there.

00:28:47.362 --> 00:28:50.719
Like I told him what kind of shower we're going to put in a bathroom.

00:28:50.719 --> 00:28:55.880
I told him what kind of sink we're going to put in a bathroom, because we were doing a bathroom renovation and we did all of the things.

00:28:55.880 --> 00:28:57.482
I felt great.

00:28:57.482 --> 00:29:01.637
I had energy and I didn't have any brain fatigue.

00:29:01.637 --> 00:29:03.084
I didn't have any Braxton Hicks.

00:29:03.084 --> 00:29:04.249
Like all was well.

00:29:04.308 --> 00:29:11.116
We got home I folded laundry, hung out with the puppy and I started getting contractions and I'm like this is actually happening.

00:29:11.116 --> 00:29:12.278
My husband was outside.

00:29:12.278 --> 00:29:12.807
I went over.

00:29:12.807 --> 00:29:14.135
I'm like, hey, just so you know.

00:29:14.135 --> 00:29:17.221
And then I had to stop for contraction and he's like what's going on?

00:29:17.221 --> 00:29:20.196
I'm like I'm like put up my finger to like just wait a minute.

00:29:20.196 --> 00:29:24.708
I'm like I'm having contractions and he's like, oh, how far apart of there.

00:29:24.708 --> 00:29:30.613
I'm like I don't know, I haven't timed them yet, but they're pretty real and they were Just so close together.

00:29:30.613 --> 00:29:32.684
I'm like, holy galley, this is happening.

00:29:32.684 --> 00:29:36.025
So we called the doula and I'm like, yeah, so it's been going on for about half an hour.

00:29:36.025 --> 00:29:37.825
She's like, okay, yeah, that's not like the real thing.

00:29:37.825 --> 00:29:44.038
How about you go take a shower and just lay down on your side in bed and just relax, get some rest if you can?

00:29:44.667 --> 00:29:46.256
I showered, which was great.

00:29:46.256 --> 00:29:55.068
I was starving, hungry, and so my husband made me a sandwich and I could not eat it and I cried because I couldn't eat my sandwich, mm-hmm.

00:29:55.068 --> 00:29:58.164
I didn't cry because of the contractions, although they were uncomfortable.

00:29:58.164 --> 00:30:05.424
I cried because I was hungry and I'm like I'm gonna go to the hospital starving hungry, and then they're not gonna let me eat, because that was the one thing I had never talked about with anybody.

00:30:05.424 --> 00:30:08.173
I was like I want to eat when I'm in labor, if at all possible.

00:30:08.173 --> 00:30:09.963
Right, because I don't know how long this is gonna go.

00:30:09.963 --> 00:30:15.574
I want to keep up my strength, because I was determined to eat before I went to the hospital, but I couldn't get it down.

00:30:15.815 --> 00:30:16.037
Mm-hmm.

00:30:16.258 --> 00:30:21.585
So always well, it's crazy how much superpower you have when you go into the process of labor.

00:30:21.945 --> 00:30:24.772
So then, how could you tell the difference between Braxton Hicks and real?

00:30:24.813 --> 00:30:25.355
contractions.

00:30:25.355 --> 00:30:26.257
That's a good question.

00:30:26.257 --> 00:30:30.181
You know, as a first-timer I sometimes discredit myself.

00:30:30.181 --> 00:30:37.769
But also I Talked to my old sister sometimes about price and Hicks contractions and she said you know, first time moms they never have Braxton Hicks.

00:30:37.769 --> 00:30:47.730
And I'm like I'm calling bullshit because I'm having Braxton Hicks and there is nothing wrong with the position of my baby because she was like well, then there's something wrong, the position of your baby.

00:30:47.730 --> 00:31:05.788
I'm like, well, I have ultrasound Every month and at the end, like every week, I'm like there is nothing wrong and I just think that you I don't know this, but it's not the answer anybody wants when you're in tune with your body, you just know that's that's.

00:31:05.909 --> 00:31:24.934
I know like the most cliche just feels different so what we usually describe is that instead of just like the tightening down in them, the sides of the uterus, you start to seal the Top of the uterus, pushing down, and I honestly don't remember I can't describe it either what the difference is between the Braxton Hicks and the regular contractions.

00:31:24.934 --> 00:31:30.125
I just know that it's like a full-body experience when you're having regular contractions versus the Braxton Hicks.

00:31:30.385 --> 00:31:31.329
Yeah, it is.

00:31:31.329 --> 00:31:32.736
It is a totally different experience.

00:31:32.736 --> 00:31:39.756
Like I had Braxton Hicks like around 37 weeks and I'm like man, I hope this is the real thing, but it wasn't, you know cuz.

00:31:39.756 --> 00:31:45.365
So at 37 weeks I kind of wanted baby to come, but then 40 weeks, I'm like this is so awesome, let's stay pregnant forever.

00:31:45.365 --> 00:31:47.671
This is fun, which is so weird.

00:31:47.730 --> 00:31:50.257
But I was very much the opposite.

00:31:51.826 --> 00:31:58.439
I don't think that I make a majority and I just I just knew in my gut that this was a real contraction.

00:31:58.439 --> 00:32:01.324
I just knew it because it came out of nowhere.

00:32:01.324 --> 00:32:05.525
And Then they kept on happening and I had to breathe through them.

00:32:05.925 --> 00:32:11.728
Mm-hmm and it would catch my breath if I was talking, like I would have to, like I stopped, like I had to stop, I couldn't talk through them.

00:32:11.728 --> 00:32:20.887
And I know some women are like super women and they talk for all their contractions and people are like, yeah, you're not gonna have that baby for like another several hours, just relax, taking app.

00:32:20.887 --> 00:32:25.097
And then they have it two minutes later, like I know that's a unicorn like I know that.

00:32:25.766 --> 00:32:27.731
Happen, but that did not happen to me.

00:32:27.731 --> 00:32:28.634
That was not my story.

00:32:28.634 --> 00:32:35.384
Um, we went to the hospital while, I think, contraction started around four and we went to the hospital shortly after six.

00:32:35.384 --> 00:32:37.073
You know what time did you deliver?

00:32:37.073 --> 00:32:39.162
Do you remember the next day at 9 30 in the morning?

00:32:39.162 --> 00:32:49.441
Oh my gosh, I went way too soon, but like I was so uncomfortable now I had been, my baby was really really low for like I don't know five or six weeks.

00:32:49.441 --> 00:32:55.135
Like he was down there and Ultra sound techs were like I don't know how, he's still inside of you.

00:32:55.527 --> 00:32:59.964
I wonder if, like if they had burst my water, if he would have been delivered sooner.

00:32:59.964 --> 00:33:08.464
But like my water just didn't break and I was very uncomfortable and so I just wanted to go to the hospital just so that I would be in the place that I was going to be giving birth.

00:33:08.464 --> 00:33:09.911
Does your doula come right away?

00:33:09.911 --> 00:33:10.492
She did.

00:33:10.492 --> 00:33:13.748
She had like an hour drive, but she was.

00:33:13.748 --> 00:33:23.637
She canceled her evening plans and she came out and she was glad to cancel her evening plans Because she's an introvert, and so she was glad that she didn't have to go and she was with me the whole entire time at the hospital.

00:33:23.637 --> 00:33:30.856
So I thought I would labor at home and then one thing is we were like really progressing, then I would go to the hospital like that was what I envisioned.

00:33:30.856 --> 00:33:32.568
I actually never came up with a birth plan.

00:33:32.568 --> 00:33:41.126
I don't envision that I ever will if I have more because it's not gonna go the way you planned exactly.

00:33:42.365 --> 00:33:50.337
You have an idea of what you want and what you Can negotiate, but you're never gonna be able to just be like oh, I don't want that if that's the only option.

00:33:50.384 --> 00:33:52.532
You know what I mean, yeah so you gotta be flexible.

00:33:52.532 --> 00:33:54.977
My doula was like do you want to labor in the top?

00:33:54.977 --> 00:33:56.664
No, I hate water on my face.

00:33:56.664 --> 00:34:02.915
If I take a bath and I get like a drop of water on my face, I'm like this has to go now where I'm out.

00:34:02.915 --> 00:34:04.744
Yeah, like I just hate water on my face.

00:34:04.744 --> 00:34:10.382
So like we had those conversations and I did try the shower for a little while.

00:34:10.382 --> 00:34:11.144
I hated it.

00:34:11.405 --> 00:34:13.369
If you don't like water, it's not gonna be very relaxing.

00:34:13.550 --> 00:34:16.978
Yeah, I mean it like water is relaxing, for me.

00:34:16.978 --> 00:34:19.110
I just hate it on my face, mm-hmm.

00:34:19.693 --> 00:34:20.275
It's hard to do.

00:34:20.576 --> 00:34:23.271
Yeah, I mean also with being monitored all the time.

00:34:23.271 --> 00:34:25.900
It just made it like not relaxing to be in the shower.

00:34:25.900 --> 00:34:26.945
It's a toilet.

00:34:26.945 --> 00:34:28.871
Oh, that opens your pelvis.

00:34:28.871 --> 00:34:30.637
It was torture.

00:34:30.637 --> 00:34:31.300
Mm-hmm.

00:34:31.300 --> 00:34:32.864
I hate everything really low.

00:34:32.864 --> 00:34:38.702
Yeah, like it was hard for me, and I also hated the peanut ball, mm-hmm.

00:34:38.702 --> 00:34:45.855
Yeah, it looks like it should be the most comfortable thing in the world, but, oh man, I did flip my doula off a few times.

00:34:47.846 --> 00:34:48.467
That's funny.

00:34:48.467 --> 00:34:50.371
So what positions did you like?

00:34:50.371 --> 00:34:51.152
None of them.

00:34:51.152 --> 00:34:53.275
None of them because you're uncomfortable.

00:34:53.496 --> 00:35:00.067
Yeah, I really I Laying on my side without the peanut ball was okay, mm-hmm.

00:35:00.067 --> 00:35:08.496
I say I think I liked when I was like Facing the bed, like when the bed was like in a sitting position and I can put my arms up on the top, because then I could kind of hang down.

00:35:08.496 --> 00:35:12.353
I never asked my doula about it, but she never really let me be in that position a lot.

00:35:12.887 --> 00:35:22.304
But I also ended up having a little tiny bit of a cervical lip, I think mm-hmm and so they really needed to do positions that would help, and so the peanut ball yeah the peanut ball.

00:35:22.445 --> 00:35:25.505
Sometimes that hanging position is harder to monitor.

00:35:25.646 --> 00:35:34.003
To yeah, I would always I think it's just my thing on my belly and then it would, you know, go off, and then there have been people who would check it and all of that crap.

00:35:34.003 --> 00:35:36.952
So, yeah, I spent a lot of time on the toilet.

00:35:36.952 --> 00:35:40.844
I had to really really work on breathing through that actually something I loved.

00:35:40.844 --> 00:35:50.275
I don't remember what it's called, so my doula taught us spinning babies, mm-hmm, and she did some of the spinning babies exercises with me.

00:35:50.275 --> 00:35:59.628
I Absolutely loved when she and the nurse helped to get my backside into what's that thing called like.

00:35:59.628 --> 00:36:02.554
It's like a hammock, but it's like a Robozo or something.

00:36:02.554 --> 00:36:03.978
Yeah, yeah, it's Robozo.

00:36:03.978 --> 00:36:09.902
Yeah, they lifted me up in that and they said, when you have a contraction, just shake your booty.

00:36:09.902 --> 00:36:11.811
I'm like how the heck am I gonna do that here?

00:36:11.811 --> 00:36:14.748
I am like 230 pounds or whatever.

00:36:14.748 --> 00:36:25.858
I was at that time about that and I am hugely pregnant and I'm going to have a contraction and you want me to lift my butt off of this bed and then shake it.

00:36:25.858 --> 00:36:28.074
Okay, but it was amazing.

00:36:28.757 --> 00:36:29.057
Mm-hmm.

00:36:29.077 --> 00:36:29.097
I.

00:36:29.097 --> 00:36:31.829
It was like the best thing in the world.

00:36:31.829 --> 00:36:33.797
I could have done that probably the whole entire time.

00:36:33.797 --> 00:36:34.318
Well, I couldn't.

00:36:34.318 --> 00:36:35.302
Yeah, yeah were you?

00:36:35.463 --> 00:36:39.039
were you like on your we sitting or were you on your back when you did?

00:36:39.079 --> 00:36:43.356
that I lifted myself up on my feet, in my hands, and they held.

00:36:43.356 --> 00:36:51.806
And of course Then they held, gave a little bit of support in the midsection with holding that, but literally, I like, did you have a push bar or something To hang on to, or you just stood up?

00:36:51.806 --> 00:36:54.376
Oh, I brazed myself on my hands and my feet.

00:36:54.376 --> 00:36:57.565
Okay, I maybe held on to the bed on the sides.

00:36:57.565 --> 00:36:58.929
My husband was sleeping other time.

00:36:58.929 --> 00:37:01.152
He didn't help at all, I wasn't even jealous of him.

00:37:01.152 --> 00:37:04.141
I'm like this, saint, I guess probably.

00:37:06.181 --> 00:37:08.228
My husband just got in the way so I didn't care.

00:37:08.228 --> 00:37:11.005
It's like I got my girls to take care of it.

00:37:11.106 --> 00:37:13.271
Yeah, my nurse had never heard of doing that.

00:37:13.271 --> 00:37:19.833
Actually, she didn't know anything about spinning babies and my do lo was like, hey, can I teach you how to do something?

00:37:19.833 --> 00:37:21.327
She's like, yeah, anything, whatever helps.

00:37:21.327 --> 00:37:22.603
And so she gave her.

00:37:22.603 --> 00:37:25.391
She had papers on what we were gonna, what she wanted to do.

00:37:25.391 --> 00:37:37.840
The nurse went in like study the papers a bit, and when she had an idea of what was going on she was like my doulas second doula pretty much, and I mean she was Amazing.

00:37:37.840 --> 00:37:40.025
She helped with that position and I loved it.

00:37:40.025 --> 00:37:42.291
It was so relaxing on my body somehow.

00:37:42.291 --> 00:37:46.652
And then when I was Laboring on the toilet, she gave me a back massage.

00:37:46.652 --> 00:37:47.820
Hmm, that's so nice.

00:37:47.820 --> 00:37:50.224
So I had a really positive experience.

00:37:50.224 --> 00:37:54.333
Now, the craziest thing that calmed me was massaging my doulas arm.

00:37:54.760 --> 00:37:58.387
Massaging your doulas arm like you were massaging her arm.

00:37:58.387 --> 00:38:02.485
Yeah, cuz you were focusing on something else to do Like a stress ball.

00:38:02.706 --> 00:38:05.688
Yeah, this is different, but I like this.

00:38:05.688 --> 00:38:08.860
Uh-huh, that's really helped me to think outside of myself.

00:38:08.860 --> 00:38:13.320
Mm-hmm, and you know, like when you're massaging you don't want to like beat somebody up, right?

00:38:13.380 --> 00:38:21.030
You got to be gentle right, so it helped me to just have like a gentle energy in my body, Relaxing and just so.

00:38:21.030 --> 00:38:22.380
Yeah, that was one of the best things.

00:38:22.380 --> 00:38:27.679
I did start kind of spinning out of control sometime in the night and I was like I I think we should do a c-section.

00:38:27.679 --> 00:38:28.864
I was so.

00:38:28.864 --> 00:38:30.369
Were you close to delivery at that time?

00:38:30.369 --> 00:38:33.300
No, no, I dilate is so freaking slow.

00:38:33.300 --> 00:38:41.536
So when I got to the hospital I was not even three centimeters dilated, but because I was 41 and three they're like you and because you have this history.

00:38:41.856 --> 00:38:43.922
Yeah, they're like You're in labor.

00:38:43.922 --> 00:38:46.248
You can be here at six o'clock in the morning.

00:38:46.248 --> 00:38:52.190
When my doctor checked on me, I was only seven centimeters and that was 12 hours of labor or like 14.

00:38:53.601 --> 00:38:55.086
Why then you could have gotten an epidural?

00:38:56.740 --> 00:39:00.942
Yeah, I like, but I don't the anesthesiologist I'm.

00:39:00.942 --> 00:39:02.891
So my dog, my doula, bless hers.

00:39:02.891 --> 00:39:09.472
Even though she knew that the answer was no, she went and asked if I could have medication Because I was so sure that I needed it.

00:39:09.472 --> 00:39:17.327
My husband was sleeping, and that's a key point, because after he woke up I completely calmed down in a regain that power.

00:39:17.327 --> 00:39:18.771
I can do this, I'll be fine.

00:39:20.960 --> 00:39:27.519
That's that rush of oxytocin in that feeling of safety, yeah, like it increases your cortisol levels and pushes, pushes you through labor.

00:39:27.780 --> 00:39:40.210
Yeah, it was amazing, like I wasn't upset that he was sleeping, like I was fine with that, I was glad he was sleeping, you know, so he could get some rest, because, you know, I couldn't, and I had so much support with my doula and with the nurse that was assigned to my room and so I'm like I'm fine.

00:39:40.210 --> 00:39:44.929
But then I started to not be fine and so they gave me whatever that gas is nitrous oxide.

00:39:44.929 --> 00:39:46.554
Yeah, it didn't work.

00:39:46.554 --> 00:39:49.961
It was like I don't know what this stuff is, but it sure doesn't help.

00:39:49.961 --> 00:39:55.391
It actually made it worse because I had to focus on breathing it in in I.

00:39:55.391 --> 00:39:56.713
It was awful.

00:39:56.713 --> 00:40:00.440
And they're like I don't think this thing is working because it's supposed to make you happy.

00:40:00.922 --> 00:40:11.268
I like that's the thing about nitrous oxide the machines are hard to use, it's hard to figure out if it's working or not and then, in addition, when it is working, it doesn't help everybody it did not make me any difference.

00:40:11.349 --> 00:40:12.652
It made me more stressed out.

00:40:12.652 --> 00:40:15.405
So I was like I told my doula, like you have to hold this.

00:40:15.405 --> 00:40:16.648
She's like I'm not allowed to.

00:40:16.648 --> 00:40:20.344
I said, well, I am not doing this so mad.

00:40:20.344 --> 00:40:24.307
I'm like again it's not working and I really like that.

00:40:24.307 --> 00:40:26.440
I really started to forget to focus on breathing.

00:40:26.440 --> 00:40:35.378
I started to like make like more higher pitch sounds instead of low pitch and whatever you know, like women in labor are just weird like they do.

00:40:35.398 --> 00:40:39.000
Yeah, well, I mean, it's hard to not have a stress response when you're in that much pain.

00:40:39.420 --> 00:40:50.159
Yeah, you have to really focus to not have that stress response and when my husband finally came around because I think I think he woke up, because he started to notice things weren't as great as they were, something I don't know what woke- you were in active labor.

00:40:50.360 --> 00:40:52.447
If you're at seven centimeters, that's when things get real.

00:40:52.608 --> 00:40:59.219
Yeah, he came and he just, he just, I don't know, like he probably held my hand or he just touched my arm, I don't know what he did.

00:40:59.219 --> 00:41:01.650
He said, babe, just breathe, yeah, just just breathe.

00:41:01.650 --> 00:41:07.710
And I felt my body just finally relax again and I I never thought about needing pain medications again.

00:41:07.710 --> 00:41:10.478
So he was a really awesome support person.

00:41:10.478 --> 00:41:19.894
And when my doctor came at like six and I wasn't, you know, more than seven centimeters dilated, I was just so uncomfortable and my water hadn't broken.

00:41:19.914 --> 00:41:26.119
And my doctor, my doula, discussed it and my doula is, like you know, I really think it would be good to break her water.

00:41:26.119 --> 00:41:35.204
And my doctor, like I remember this conversation because it was interesting and I was still with it, you know, because I wasn't drugged, I was totally with it still.

00:41:35.204 --> 00:41:40.327
And my doctor looked at her and she said I have never heard a doula Recommend breaking water.

00:41:40.327 --> 00:41:43.458
And my dude was like what I believe in getting things done right?

00:41:43.458 --> 00:41:47.824
And I said is it going to help me have less pressure?

00:41:47.824 --> 00:41:52.867
And they said yes, but then it won't also intensify, and I said, well, I just want the pressure gone.

00:41:52.867 --> 00:41:54.054
So could you run your babies?

00:41:54.114 --> 00:42:07.972
out the pressures come, yeah, but like I had so much pressure and it was, it was so uncomfortable and sometimes I felt like I needed to push, but obviously I couldn't put yet it was too soon and the pressure was just worse than a contraction.

00:42:07.972 --> 00:42:14.775
Mm-hmm and so they broke my water and, much to my disappointment, there was no big spleush of water.

00:42:14.775 --> 00:42:18.757
There was no there was no big anything, it was just a trickle.

00:42:19.621 --> 00:42:20.914
Mm-hmm, probably your baby's head was.

00:42:21.358 --> 00:42:32.780
yeah, he was down there you know I wanted drama because I like drama, yeah, but the pressure left and it was a real leaf like obviously labor picked up intensity Incredibly.

00:42:32.780 --> 00:42:45.231
I finally felt that loss of the pressure and it felt like I could focus on breathing through contractions again instead of just that pushing, interestingly enough, like they tried to get me to go to the bathroom before the baby was born and I had nothing.

00:42:46.081 --> 00:42:48.766
Yeah, I'm like the baby said so low it's probably blocking everything.

00:42:49.068 --> 00:42:49.168
I.

00:42:49.168 --> 00:42:51.452
They were like you have to pee, you have to pee.

00:42:51.452 --> 00:42:55.003
And I sat there and like I cannot pee, mm-hmm.

00:42:55.003 --> 00:42:56.672
And I have been drinking really large.

00:42:56.672 --> 00:43:00.065
I had been drinking water, I had been eating Jell-O, you know.

00:43:00.065 --> 00:43:04.981
So there would should have been a lot of fluids, but I'm like I cannot pee, mm-hmm.

00:43:04.981 --> 00:43:06.786
They're like you have to pee, you have to poop.

00:43:06.786 --> 00:43:07.648
You got to get that all out.

00:43:07.648 --> 00:43:14.353
I'm like I cannot, and I thought you know it's normal to be able to, and so I felt like maybe there was something wrong with me.

00:43:14.353 --> 00:43:18.056
But at the same time, I was at the point of being just like very easily irritated.

00:43:18.056 --> 00:43:19.784
I'm like I can't, mm-hmm.

00:43:19.784 --> 00:43:22.880
So let me get back to something a little more comfortable.

00:43:22.880 --> 00:43:24.244
And you know what?

00:43:24.244 --> 00:43:25.889
If I shit the bed, I should the bed.

00:43:25.889 --> 00:43:26.369
Who cares?

00:43:26.791 --> 00:43:28.235
Yeah no one cares.

00:43:28.617 --> 00:43:32.001
I didn't, but oh, that was a good time.

00:43:32.001 --> 00:43:33.182
So how was pushing?

00:43:33.182 --> 00:43:34.563
It was so fun?

00:43:35.485 --> 00:43:38.452
Yeah, because you're like you feel better when you're pushing into the pain, right.

00:43:38.472 --> 00:43:40.057
Yeah, how long did you push?

00:43:40.057 --> 00:43:42.614
Well, my husband and I don't agree on this.

00:43:42.614 --> 00:43:44.945
I think it was 40 minutes and he thinks it's 20.

00:43:45.166 --> 00:43:48.264
Hmm, it feels a lot longer when you're the one doing the pushing.

00:43:48.626 --> 00:43:53.784
Yeah, and I know that my doula has extensive notes and I should have maybe asked her for them before this.

00:43:54.445 --> 00:43:56.434
Somewhere between 20 and 40 minutes.

00:43:56.434 --> 00:43:59.324
Maybe we could say 30 for the sake of this podcast.

00:43:59.385 --> 00:44:04.458
Yeah, it was for appearing in time and it wasn't over an hour.

00:44:04.458 --> 00:44:05.567
That's good.

00:44:05.567 --> 00:44:08.318
It was hard, it was very hard.

00:44:08.318 --> 00:44:09.983
There was a time when I told my doctor.

00:44:09.983 --> 00:44:11.471
I said you can just pull it out, can't you?

00:44:11.632 --> 00:44:14.909
I think everybody says that she's like no, babe, you got to work at this.

00:44:15.251 --> 00:44:17.900
And she says we can, but I don't think we will.

00:44:17.900 --> 00:44:21.309
But she did get the nurses to bring the needed supplies if that were to happen.

00:44:21.309 --> 00:44:30.277
But I think it was more just for my peace of mind to see that she's like we can, I'll be prepared if you need me to, but you don't need to.

00:44:30.277 --> 00:44:35.172
There was at least one time where I was pushing when I shouldn't have been and she said you have to stop pushing right now.

00:44:35.172 --> 00:44:40.952
And so I listened and then at some point I was just like okay, listen, everything feels the same.

00:44:40.952 --> 00:44:48.492
Right now you have to tell me when to push because I don't know anymore, which I am so thankful.

00:44:48.492 --> 00:44:58.271
I had the cohesion to communicate that in the middle of the intensity of pushing and whatever it's just to say, in between the contraction, I don't know the difference anymore.

00:44:58.271 --> 00:45:00.038
You tell me when to go and I'm a go.

00:45:00.038 --> 00:45:08.190
It was so fun, just before pushing started, like all the nurses came in and they prepared the whole room and honestly it felt like there was going to be a party, yeah.

00:45:09.132 --> 00:45:12.746
It really was going to be a party, like a surprise party.

00:45:12.947 --> 00:45:15.673
Everybody was so quiet, everything was so peaceful.

00:45:15.673 --> 00:45:22.518
It did not disrupt my calm space at all, like sometimes people talk about how that disrupts everything.

00:45:22.518 --> 00:45:24.063
It was not disruptive at all.

00:45:24.063 --> 00:45:25.548
It was like so peaceful.

00:45:25.548 --> 00:45:32.530
And I learned later on that all the nurses were jealous of the nurses assigned to my room because it was so quiet in my room.

00:45:32.530 --> 00:45:33.552
That's a lot.

00:45:33.552 --> 00:45:42.652
So I wonder if, like it just I don't know if that played into how their presence came into my room, where they were just like this is a calm space and they're able to maintain that.

00:45:42.652 --> 00:45:43.574
I don't know, but it was.

00:45:43.574 --> 00:45:45.512
It did not disrupt me at all.

00:45:45.512 --> 00:45:46.677
Like it did not distract me.

00:45:46.677 --> 00:45:49.086
Like I watched them, like this is so awesome.

00:45:49.086 --> 00:45:50.210
Here it goes.

00:45:50.210 --> 00:45:52.856
So it was hard but I loved it.

00:45:53.018 --> 00:45:59.181
I was able to feel every part of my baby just slipped out and it was so cool so I didn't want to watch.

00:45:59.181 --> 00:46:01.728
They were like you can watch, like here's a mirror, we can drop it down.

00:46:01.728 --> 00:46:12.106
I'm like I am not looking at this, but I will feel it and it was just so amazing to just feel everything, to feel like the shoulders and the legs just slip out.

00:46:12.106 --> 00:46:14.376
I always told my husband, and this is what we.

00:46:14.376 --> 00:46:17.650
What we envisioned for birth was that the baby is just going to slip out.

00:46:17.650 --> 00:46:18.596
That's what we said.

00:46:18.596 --> 00:46:22.797
The baby is just going to slip out, and obviously you push the baby up, but in some ways they do just slip out.

00:46:23.679 --> 00:46:23.880
Yeah.

00:46:23.961 --> 00:46:25.106
Once you get past that heart part.

00:46:25.106 --> 00:46:26.972
Yeah, I didn't feel the ring of fire.

00:46:26.972 --> 00:46:28.338
Oh, that's interesting.

00:46:28.338 --> 00:46:31.387
Yeah, so some of my breathing practices can remember.

00:46:31.387 --> 00:46:39.976
One time very specifically thinking I don't want to feel that ring of fire because people talk about how awful it is, and that was just one of my goals was to not feel that.

00:46:39.976 --> 00:46:41.009
I don't remember it.

00:46:41.009 --> 00:46:45.646
Yeah, obviously it happened, because it's just part of the process, but I didn't feel it.

00:46:45.847 --> 00:46:49.117
And then do you remember, if you had like a tear, that they need to sure I pair anything.

00:46:49.704 --> 00:46:58.079
So I had the teeniest, tiniest little tear that I never felt and my doctor's like you do not need stitches, it's just going to make it worse.

00:46:58.079 --> 00:47:00.206
Yeah, because then you're going to have to heal from the stitches.

00:47:01.088 --> 00:47:03.735
Did you like get to hold your baby right away.

00:47:03.735 --> 00:47:04.356
What was all that?

00:47:05.288 --> 00:47:06.853
Yeah, I got to hold him right away.

00:47:06.853 --> 00:47:15.947
We don't have any pictures that are worthy to be shared, because I was living in the moment, yeah, and I'm like we don't have any of those cute family pictures.

00:47:15.947 --> 00:47:17.590
That's the only disappointment I have.

00:47:17.590 --> 00:47:19.416
But yes, I got to hold him right away.

00:47:19.416 --> 00:47:20.713
Everything was fine.

00:47:20.713 --> 00:47:22.873
The placenta delivered very quickly.

00:47:22.873 --> 00:47:27.938
They didn't even give me a lot of pitocin, because I remember my doula saying I think you can cut the pitocin.

00:47:27.938 --> 00:47:37.291
The hospital had like a whole smorker's board of oils and so during pushing they kept me very oiled up, so that probably helped with not tearing.

00:47:37.291 --> 00:47:40.443
It was just such a cool experience, awesome.

00:47:40.443 --> 00:47:41.927
And then how was your recovery?

00:47:41.927 --> 00:47:42.148
Like?

00:47:42.148 --> 00:47:43.190
How was postpartum?

00:47:43.230 --> 00:47:43.590
for you.

00:47:44.293 --> 00:47:52.931
So I had to spend two nights in the hospital because maybe his oxygen levels were inconsistent and the reason why they had to monitor it was because he was a week and a half overdue.

00:47:52.931 --> 00:47:59.195
If he had been on his due date or before they wouldn't have cared, but since he was a little bit over, they had to keep him.

00:47:59.195 --> 00:48:01.391
You don't get a lot of rest there, yeah.

00:48:01.552 --> 00:48:02.516
That is a true statement.

00:48:02.757 --> 00:48:05.347
Also, he had to be on the Billy Rubin.

00:48:05.347 --> 00:48:07.032
He hated it.

00:48:07.755 --> 00:48:17.449
But like on the lights or on the when he was getting stuck On the lights just being yeah, because then we weren't really allowed to hold him he latched very quickly the first latch.

00:48:17.449 --> 00:48:19.601
It was easy to breastfeed him Sorry, it was breastfeeding.

00:48:19.601 --> 00:48:29.414
But then with like the stress of him needing to have the blue light and all of those things, it really started to affect me and so we actually had a hard time latching.

00:48:29.414 --> 00:48:34.170
So we finally decided to supplement a little bit with a donated milk.

00:48:34.369 --> 00:48:34.931
Oh, they have that.

00:48:34.931 --> 00:48:35.452
That's amazing.

00:48:35.452 --> 00:48:39.250
So you got donor milk and then were you pumping during that time.

00:48:39.811 --> 00:48:49.224
Yeah, attempting to like, nothing came out, but yes, the process of just keeping my breast activated and all of the things there was so also.

00:48:49.344 --> 00:48:59.164
But they couldn't release him until his John's levels came down and they couldn't release him until his oxygen levels were good and obviously he needed to eat all of those things.

00:48:59.164 --> 00:48:59.686
I don't like this.

00:48:59.686 --> 00:49:00.630
Why I wanted a home birth?

00:49:00.630 --> 00:49:10.894
Because I mean, I respect that some of that stuff had to happen, but with the intensity of like two nurses assigned to each of us and then the lactation consultant and then the other person.

00:49:10.934 --> 00:49:15.896
And the other person he was just like overwhelmingly you could not catch a break with the bottle feeding.

00:49:15.896 --> 00:49:24.612
He didn't want to take it and he still has, like this hate for bottles, and so we were trying to give him a bottle and he was just fighting it and fighting and fighting it.

00:49:24.612 --> 00:49:27.545
And then a nurse came in and she says, well, I'll show you how to do it.

00:49:27.545 --> 00:49:30.701
And she just tipped that thing up and he had it chugged in like 30 seconds.

00:49:30.701 --> 00:49:33.068
And I was just like you, just I hate you.

00:49:33.068 --> 00:49:36.860
I'm like you can't eat that fast.

00:49:36.860 --> 00:49:39.427
That's not how fast he would get from my breast.

00:49:39.427 --> 00:49:44.077
And now you just right, he got it so fast that he doesn't even know if he's full.

00:49:44.925 --> 00:49:47.233
And so the next time he gave exactly paced bottle feeding.

00:49:49.106 --> 00:49:52.721
Oh, I was just like this is a newborn, Like he's a day old, he's not one.

00:49:52.721 --> 00:49:54.288
Anyways, that was, that was hard.

00:49:54.288 --> 00:50:01.139
So the next time he gave cues for being hungry, I just like nursed him right away to put him on the breast and he just latched and he was like in heaven.

00:50:01.139 --> 00:50:09.235
And then one of the nurses found out and she's like you're not allowed to do that until we've checked his oxygen levels, and I'm like, but he was, he was crying and he was hungry.

00:50:09.505 --> 00:50:10.550
Was he being monitored?

00:50:10.550 --> 00:50:12.983
They weren't monitoring his oxygen levels consistently.

00:50:13.043 --> 00:50:13.846
Or was he in your room?

00:50:13.846 --> 00:50:14.847
He was in my room.

00:50:15.429 --> 00:50:16.452
That's interesting yeah.

00:50:16.833 --> 00:50:17.795
Oh, he was a ride.

00:50:17.795 --> 00:50:24.498
So that was hard, and when we got home, always well, I didn't really deal with postpartum anxiety or depression.

00:50:24.498 --> 00:50:28.106
At least I never really was like diagnosed and I never really felt it.

00:50:28.106 --> 00:50:33.000
However, I definitely look back on that period and I know like I was more easily frustrated.

00:50:33.000 --> 00:50:40.440
But I also only had 12 weeks of maternity leave and then I was going back to a very stressful job.

00:50:40.440 --> 00:50:57.014
That was always on the back of my mind and so every day, every minute with my baby felt, and so when other people wanted to come over and see us or be with my baby felt like it was taking away from my time with him because I was already going to lose so much time with him once I went back to work.

00:50:57.014 --> 00:51:03.291
So that was definitely a struggle, some days more than others, and I didn't always handle it the best.

00:51:03.291 --> 00:51:04.811
Well, we do what we can.

00:51:05.577 --> 00:51:07.721
Yeah, did you end up going back to work?

00:51:07.721 --> 00:51:09.460
I did for nine weeks.

00:51:09.460 --> 00:51:10.543
Then what happened?

00:51:10.543 --> 00:51:11.438
I just stayed at home.

00:51:11.438 --> 00:51:13.800
That was what I wanted to do.

00:51:13.800 --> 00:51:20.737
The reason I went back to work was because if I didn't go back to work then I was disqualified for insurance.

00:51:20.737 --> 00:51:24.943
I absolutely had to keep my insurance.

00:51:24.943 --> 00:51:33.003
I also initially, in the beginning of pregnancy, thought I would be like the career mom who worked a 40-hour job and all the things.

00:51:33.003 --> 00:51:34.460
I just thought that's who I was.

00:51:34.460 --> 00:51:38.784
But pregnancy really changed that for me, where I started to start having that bond.

00:51:38.784 --> 00:51:50.666
I didn't grow a baby for nine months to leave that baby at the daycare With no disrespect for the mom who does, but for me I was just like I can't do this.

00:51:50.666 --> 00:51:52.139
I can't do this.

00:51:54.376 --> 00:51:55.059
That's the thing.

00:51:55.059 --> 00:51:58.384
We all have to decide how our life is going to change after we have kids.

00:51:58.384 --> 00:52:03.505
Some people, if that's their passion and they want that for their career, that's great.

00:52:03.505 --> 00:52:06.983
If not, you learn pretty quickly what you're going to need to do.

00:52:07.202 --> 00:52:13.847
Yeah, I got home and just a few days or a week afterwards he cut his first tooth.

00:52:13.847 --> 00:52:24.697
I was just so thankful that I was at home for that, even though my job ended a lot more abruptly than I had anticipated it ending and I had to work through a lot about that.

00:52:24.697 --> 00:52:36.027
I was just so grateful that I was at home when it had his first tooth came out, instead of having my nanny tell him oh yeah, by the way, he's teething and his tooth just came out.

00:52:36.614 --> 00:52:41.525
You've managed to pivot your career to doing your health and wellness stuff from home and coaching yeah.

00:52:42.394 --> 00:52:50.164
I have been into health and wellness for a few years before I went into a corporate kind of a job and I was attracted to a corporate work environment.

00:52:50.164 --> 00:52:51.266
I thought I want to try it.

00:52:51.266 --> 00:52:51.887
I want to do this.

00:52:51.887 --> 00:52:52.648
Maybe I can do both.

00:52:52.648 --> 00:53:29.063
I had been fairly successful in the health and wellness world before, but I want to experience the nine to five because I always saw myself as being that person and then while I was pregnant, I'm like no, this is not really what I want to do with my life and I really want to get back into being more, into sharing health and wellness with other moms, specifically because what it did for me before I started sharing was I didn't need to take naps anymore and I started growing a vision for actually being an energetic mom and hopefully someday an energetic grandma and maybe for being into health and wellness.

00:53:29.063 --> 00:53:31.701
Couldn't have done that Like I was in such poor health.

00:53:32.135 --> 00:53:34.041
Well, within the PCOS probably wasn't helping.

00:53:34.041 --> 00:53:35.657
Yeah, getting those hormones.

00:53:35.657 --> 00:53:36.639
Balance is pretty important.

00:53:37.121 --> 00:53:41.961
Yeah, I mean being able to get pregnant with a PCOS diagnosis is just amazing in its own.

00:53:42.523 --> 00:53:43.844
Yeah, naturally get pregnant.

00:53:43.844 --> 00:53:44.686
That's awesome.

00:53:44.967 --> 00:53:52.601
Yeah, it was a bit of a transition, honestly, because so I had done it before, like I said, and then getting back into it, like the whole market changed.

00:53:52.601 --> 00:53:56.302
I was coming back to a completely different world.

00:53:56.302 --> 00:53:59.826
I still had a support group of people that I could jump back into.

00:53:59.826 --> 00:54:05.005
I wasn't by myself, like I had a team of people to just jump back in with, but things were different.

00:54:05.005 --> 00:54:12.103
With them, the community had changed a little bit, because I had been out of it for like two years and it just there was a lot of mind stuff that I had to work through.

00:54:12.103 --> 00:54:19.539
And so when I had the opportunity to become certified as a life and mindset coach, I'm like obviously I'm doing this.

00:54:19.539 --> 00:54:22.476
Yeah, absolutely, I need it.

00:54:22.617 --> 00:54:31.083
People have always said, like you're really good at listening, I love talking to you, and I'm like I better get some tools so that I can actually listen.

00:54:31.083 --> 00:54:42.844
Well, and if I want to lead a successful team in health and wellness, then what better tools to have but the ability to actually sit with people and coach them through whatever mind drama they're going through?

00:54:42.844 --> 00:54:44.586
Yeah, how do I balance it all?

00:54:44.586 --> 00:54:46.958
I'm still figuring it out, aren't we all?

00:54:46.958 --> 00:54:49.543
Sometimes my baby goes to babysitters.

00:54:49.543 --> 00:54:53.440
He doesn't really do well being away from me, and so that's always a bit of a stretch.

00:54:53.440 --> 00:54:58.606
And I want to do more than just like fit it into the cracks, because that's it doesn't.

00:54:58.606 --> 00:55:06.664
You can't really grow very successfully if you're only trying to put it in cracks, because when I feel that crack is like watching reels, yeah.

00:55:08.619 --> 00:55:12.222
I think we're all guilty of that I am so guilty of it in.

00:55:12.222 --> 00:55:18.184
But I have to say this, though with being health and wellness minded, also like leaning into being in tune with your body.

00:55:18.184 --> 00:55:45.199
Something I'm really starting to notice now with having a regular cycle for the record, I have regular cycle, yes, like it's so predictable is recognizing that there are times in my cycle where I'm a lot more creative, and then there are times in my cycle where I just really don't get a lot done and to lean into what my strengths are during my cycle and I'm just recently trying to like lean into that and work my business according to how my cycle is.

00:55:45.199 --> 00:55:57.367
Not that I ever neglect it exactly, but that I will work it differently based on how my cycle is, and that has been so empowering to just be like okay, so this is going on in my cycle.

00:55:57.367 --> 00:55:58.699
That's why you're feeling this way.

00:55:59.494 --> 00:56:00.619
What is your strength right now?

00:56:00.619 --> 00:56:06.447
During my period, I'm very, very able to focus instead of being distracted.

00:56:06.447 --> 00:56:11.780
I'm very quiet and more into whatever I decide to be in on, I'm just totally zeroed in on it.

00:56:11.780 --> 00:56:18.221
And then, at a different part of my cycle, I have so much creative energy and so much excitement and so much enthusiasm.

00:56:18.221 --> 00:56:26.503
I could probably work out three times a day and not feel exhausted, and so just like working my business with the rhythms of my body.

00:56:26.503 --> 00:56:27.585
That's awesome, yeah.

00:56:28.934 --> 00:56:31.023
Well, Trisha, is there anything that we didn't cover that you wanted to talk about?

00:56:31.315 --> 00:56:37.914
You know, honestly it looks a lot different than I thought it would look, but I think basically covered most of the things.

00:56:37.914 --> 00:56:42.248
I didn't talk about how big my baby was, which, below some people away, he was eight pounds 13 ounces.

00:56:42.248 --> 00:56:45.719
Oh wow, Natural delivery, and I thought that wasn't.

00:56:45.719 --> 00:56:49.813
I thought it was a good size baby, Like I didn't really think of him as big or like that.

00:56:49.934 --> 00:56:52.820
I mean but you were 41 weeks in three days, so they just, they keep getting bigger.

00:56:52.880 --> 00:56:53.782
Yeah, they don't shrink.

00:56:53.902 --> 00:56:54.403
No, they don't.

00:56:54.844 --> 00:57:11.103
Yeah, and like I only had like the tiniest of tears and it just is that reminder that when you lean into your body's strengths and you just trust your body and you have a birth support team that knows what you want, like my doctor knew I didn't want to be medicated.

00:57:11.103 --> 00:57:15.286
My doctor knew that I wanted natural and she knew that I was practicing hypnobirthing.

00:57:16.458 --> 00:57:17.420
She knew how to help you.

00:57:17.641 --> 00:57:27.619
Yes, and she was just like there for me in it all and she, she like held the space for me when I needed space and she pushed me when I needed to be like pushed and said, no, like you can't relax right now.

00:57:27.619 --> 00:57:30.739
That's awesome and a tiny little tear.

00:57:30.739 --> 00:57:34.036
I also think it really helped to be like stretching what is that word?

00:57:34.036 --> 00:57:46.543
Again, the perennial stretch, oh, the perennials, the perennial stretching, yeah, and I think like just a combination of some of those things really helped me to be able to deliver that chunk of a baby without needing stitches.

00:57:46.543 --> 00:57:55.923
And also I have to say this because you're a nurse, I'm allowed to my first poop was like the best poop of my life.

00:57:56.224 --> 00:57:57.715
Isn't it, though, if?

00:57:58.077 --> 00:58:00.164
you don't, if it's, if you're not pushing, it's pretty great.

00:58:00.164 --> 00:58:04.005
I went to the bathroom and I came out and like that was awesome.

00:58:05.597 --> 00:58:06.360
Yeah, I remember that.

00:58:06.521 --> 00:58:09.422
Yeah, I had like heard all the bad stories about it.

00:58:09.494 --> 00:58:16.619
I'm like, oh, it's going to be awful and it wasn't good Were you nurses high-fiving you, cause like we think that's pretty great.

00:58:17.416 --> 00:58:18.943
Well, there was no nurse present.

00:58:18.943 --> 00:58:19.958
I think there was a lady.

00:58:19.958 --> 00:58:24.820
A nurse came in to check on Harrison, like my baby at the time, but she, she didn't do anything.

00:58:24.820 --> 00:58:25.704
I'm like, isn't this?

00:58:25.724 --> 00:58:26.927
awesome, she's probably the nursery nurse.

00:58:27.534 --> 00:58:28.840
It probably wasn't the postpartum nurse.

00:58:29.375 --> 00:58:31.581
I don't think she the postpartum nurse would have been pretty oppressed.

00:58:32.023 --> 00:58:37.065
Yeah, where's the nurse to celebrate my poop, because it was awesome.

00:58:37.065 --> 00:58:38.759
I shouldn't have flushed it.

00:58:38.759 --> 00:58:43.719
Everybody should have seen it Like it was so pretty oh man, I thought it was going to be awful.

00:58:44.541 --> 00:58:45.103
That's awesome.

00:58:45.103 --> 00:58:46.737
I'm so happy that you had a great job.

00:58:46.737 --> 00:58:49.543
After you delivered, I'll high-five you.

00:58:49.543 --> 00:58:50.224
Here you go.

00:58:50.224 --> 00:58:54.762
Thank you Well, trisha, if that's it.

00:58:54.762 --> 00:58:55.222
If that's it.

00:58:55.222 --> 00:59:01.306
If there's nothing else that you feel like we missed or anything, then I want to just say thank you so much for sharing.

00:59:01.306 --> 00:59:05.943
I'm so glad that we got to do this and can't wait to hear about your next baby.

00:59:05.943 --> 00:59:06.565
But no rush.

00:59:07.347 --> 00:59:08.336
Yeah, we're not.

00:59:08.336 --> 00:59:09.139
We're not rushing that one.

00:59:09.139 --> 00:59:15.563
I mean, there's a lot of people telling us we need to have a girl because we have a boy, and they're like you need to have your girl and I'm like can't plan that.

00:59:15.775 --> 00:59:21.318
Well, I look forward to continuing to watch your journey and I'm so glad that we got to connect this way.

00:59:21.900 --> 00:59:23.396
Yes, I am so glad we met Kelly.